I give up :(

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I can't take it anymore. It's like everyone I know is able to have ralationships, meet new people, go on dates etc. While I seem not to have gotten the memo. On sunday, I was with a few friends of mine and one of them introduced this girl who I had seen around but never actually spoken to. Anyway, I felt like talking to her but I just didn't know what to say. I never know what to say to people. It seems like all I talk about is science, comicbooks and movies. Other people have a wider repetoir in terms of the topics that they can talk about.

I do long for companionship but whenever the thought crossess my mind I think about the fact that I like being alone and also what would I say to a significant other. I don't think I was born with the right wiring or something.

I know how you feel-even online talking to people I have trouble talking sometimes and the same thing happens online too-I start getting fogotten about and ignored. I do not know what to talk about and when I do try to meet they turn away from me and want to have nothing to do with me.

I find the biggest problem for me is small talk. You need to be eliquent and to the point, your not trying to give your life story, just enough info to keep them interested, I find its best to gesture, it seems to take attention away from the monotone I tend to talk in usually a good way to start is hi my name is ___, what do you do?

I often never know what to say to people either. I tend to freeze up and blue screen like an old PC does whenever I try to make casual conversation with people or whenever they try to do so with me. I usually am forced to shrug and kind of walk away out of awkwardness. I tend to do better talking to people online in writing because I think of what to say. Even then, small talk and banter is still difficult for me.

Then take a break from chasing women and find a new hobby.

Also, join a science club. And a movie club. And... well, if you find a comic book club that has female members, join that too.

Maybe you have asperger syndrome?

Maybe you have asperger syndrome?

I used to feel like you do. You'd be surprised how different you become when you throw away your virginity.

Forget about women, relationships etc it's a pretty silly endeavour (not to imply that you're silly). People seem to have forgotten that there is more to life than finding a "significant other". There is self improvement, there is a whole world to see, there are many many hobbies one can undertake or there are many goals that someone can set themselves in order to achieve and progress to better things.

I have many times in the past wanted a relationship with someone that goes beyond friendship, and many times I've gotten myself upset about everyone else having it and me not having it. But then there are days where I'm not unhappy, I review the topic of relationships and think "why did this upset me I'm fine as I am".

I honestly don't understand what I can get from a relationship that I can get from other places, it's doesn't make sense :/

Personally I don't understand this view myself. People say that they are absolutely fine alone, maybe some are, but I have to wonder how many have had to actively convince themselves of that.

Sure, part of the idea of needing someone else is BS made up by society, but even after having gotten past envy and social status and other nonsense, it is impossible not to feel alone and empty. There are plenty of friends, but it hurts to know that I will never be as important to them as their own significant others, only to be forgotten in time. Material things like money are worthless compared to those I could share it with.

Is it really necessary to be as important to a close friend than their significant other?

To me, it is. The thought that I'm repulsive or that there's something wrong with me or just being put in the back of someone's mind drives me crazy. I don't doubt that there are people who have different kinds of lifestyles that can be perfectly fine, but as for myself, the fear that I'll never be loved is real. Everything else seems so pointless without.

I have the thought of being repulsive, but if someone puts me in the back of their mind I can'[t really do anything about it, so I just have to get on with life and finds things to do.