Should I do what feels right at the time?

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Being female, if you have a guyfriend that you like and have lots in common with but you don’t think you love (although your definition of love is so messed up for all you know you could do) and they start hugging you everytime you part then after a few months they put their arm around you and hold your hand in public then as some more time goes by the hug becomes a hug and a kiss on the cheek and it doesn’t disgust you in fact you find it nice/sweet (but havent got a clue what your feelings are in return) Then one day you get the urge to hug them at the usual time but before they have tried to hug you. How do you know if you are liking them more or are just doing the practiced behaviour of hugging because you have learned that’s the time when you hug?
I know it’s a strange I just have this crazy fear that Im going along with this hugging and it will lead to kissing and I don’t have a grip on the situation/ don’t know what Im doing.
Although I’ve never had a boyfriend Im 27 so I know the what two people do in a relationship therefore I sort of know what Im doing. I just cant work out what Im feeling and I havent go a clue as to what I think of this guy, I know he has made me a happier person since I met him but when I consider what I think of him I sometimes cant come up with anything other that indifference.
In summary – It’s when Im alone contemplating what Im doing with him that I cant think of a reason why Im doing it. However when Im with him I feel safe and I enjoy myself, sort of getting lost in the moment and sometimes do things I might not if I took an hour to consider them first.

Should I go with what feels right at the time or follow the jumbles thoughts I have when trying to make sense of it all?
Is it common to not be able to work out what your feelings are for someone?
Is it possible Im starting to like what he’s doing because its our routine and if so is that a bad thing?

I would say do what feels right in your mind, heart, and body as long as there no deeper feelings of hesitation to go forward.

If hugging leads to something you are uncomfortable with you can say stop.

Do you know what you would like or require in a boyfriend? If you can focus on that and see if he is similar to that, maybe you do like him.

How would you feel if he were to start hugging or holding hands with another girl instead of you? Sometimes it takes that little change in a situation for a person to realize what they really want.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

If it feels right, do it. If it feels wrong, stop doing it.
If you simply don't know, keep going until it feels right or wrong.

We all start out with no idea what we're doing, what we like, what we don't like. Don't be afraid to try stuff out.

Thanks for your comments I have sort of tried the - what do I want in a boyfriend and I cant really think of a box he doesnt tick, its not that he doesnt have some annoying habits though. I just think Im missing the spark that I assume should be there but maybe it shouldnt. I dont know.
I have been working on the principle of dont do anything you dont want to but as I get closer to him everything feels ok, I think thats why Im worrying Im going too far. Because I would have expected something inside me to say Stop Ive Had Enough! before now. The fact the alarm bells inside me are not ringing make me worry they are broken if you get what I mean.
Maybe Im just in shock that this could happen to me, that I could end up in a relationship when Im so clueless as to how they work.
I have also thought about him with someone else and this has had mixed results.
I cant help thinking I wouldnt be too bothered if he walked over to a girl and kissed her (maybe because I would think she is more normal than me its to be expected, I will do ok alone and someday I might find someone who knows what Im thinking before Ive said it which is what I dream of).
But if he got a girl friend I know what we are doing together would have to stop and we might even have to stop meeting altogether. This would depress me very much but mainly because I would have lost the only person that I talk to outside of work and the only person I have told all my thoughts/dreams/stories to.
This must mean I feel something for him so I will keep trying to figure out what.
And I will try to believe that the alarm bells inside me are still working and that its ok to go on until they ring.

No, I don't think there is anything wrong with hugging or snuggling, it is considered normal in the UK for a boy and a girl to hug, even if they are just friends. However I think you are craving the intimacy and comfort of a relationship and you see him as a means to provide that so you are questioning yourself. The only trouble is letting on false signals, if you feel that hugging and holding hands will lead to a relationship that you don't want, it is best to avoid physical contact.

Thats what Im having trouble working out, whether I just need a friend and he fits the bill or whether I could have him as my boyfriend/husband. I have got a much deeper understanding of the guy that I have ever had with any other friend. And I thought this was what you were supposed to think about your future husband.
Its just so frustrating because I feel that Im having to base my decisions on facts and observations of events because I cant read my own feelings or emotions on the matter.
I cant say for sure that I dont want a relationship with him, it may just be apprehension putting me off trying so I think I will just see what happens until it gets uncomfortable.

Aspies tend to be very cognitive in their approach to life, analyzing to the point of OCD. Understanding a list of facts about a person is well and good, but misses the point. The romantic spark is due to creative, poetic ability. The evolutionary origin of conversation was foreplay between a man and a woman. A man who is good at conversation can build a stronger emotional connection than someone who simply leads the way to sex.

Remembering that romance is, essentially foreplay, this leads to a deeper understanding of flirting. Physical contact is a big part of chemistry. Even if the relationship is never fully sexual, think of it in terms of light foreplay.