Sexual relationship in AS-NT marriages

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I'm wondering on this ...How do men with AS do with their sexual relationship as they go into marriage and stay their for years ? Like what sort problems arise ? how often do they have "sex"...as time goes on do the couple understand each other better and how do things develop ?

Waiting for your responses AS/NT couples..

First off you it's best not to lump all us "aspies' together like that. We are each individuals with similar characterirsitics that manifest itself depending on the individual and the circumstances. With that said I think it all depends on the individual. In my research I've found aspies to either be marvelous in bed or horrible at. Again it all depends on how much sexual experience they have, how they were brought, and how affected they are by AS.

Yes Joman ofcourse you are right...I'm my self an aspie for sure..and I know that lots of things are different between me and other Aspies...I should have benn more careful with my words up their ..

My personal experience, based on both an as objective opinion as I can and on feedback, is that I have in the past been a very good lover, but also know that I can be a rather poor one later in a relationship, with considerable variation in quality. I think my expertise comes from the fact that I have gathered considerable information through reading, etc, and have little to no modesty or inhibitions.

I'm not totally sure of the reasons for the change, but I suspect that I have a tendency to become complacent and don't fully realize it because I can't read her signals. Job & financial stresses take a huge toll. I also think some of my meds may be having sexual side effects that introduce performance issues with actual intercourse. For quite some time, most encounters with my wife have been 95% foreplay and the briefest intercourse and I've been very self-concious about it - to the point that frquency has dropped way off.

I'm interested to read others' experiences and thoughts on the subject.

I'm 16, and I am a virgin, but I must say that I am quite nervous about it. Kind of afraid actually.

This is an interesting issue and this issue is what led to me finding about me most likely being an Aspie. (I am to be diagnosed on the 5th of December.) With me I enjoy the foreplay and don’t even care that much about the intercourse. I enjoy an orgasm when it happens, it’s just that to me it is a mechanical thing that does not relate to anyone. Yes, my wife excites me, but the desire for intercourse isn’t there and when I do have an orgasm it does NOT bring me closer to her.

However, foreplay, her holding me strongly after “she” orgasms does bring me closer to her. This I can relate to. It is as if, sexual attraction (especially desire) is completely different that romantic attraction and desire. I don’t know if it’s the fact my brain doesn’t connect the two or that I’m not driven by lust.

The thing is that I’m perfectly happy with this except that my NT wife feels horrible about herself knowing that I don’t sexually desire intercourse for her. She also know that I don’t desire sexual intercourse with anyone. I do desire to please her and we enjoy lots of foreplay and pleasing her in many sexual ways. Our difficulties come in when her NT mind tells her that “intercourse” is needed for me to love and be close to her when in fact it does not. The reality is that it’s “her” mind that needs intercourse to feel close to me even though she has better orgasm when I please her without intercourse. (I’m trying not to get too graphic here.)


-Scott

(gasp)

I have sex every single time i see my girlfriend.
That is about 3-4 times a week as she lives about 10 kilometres away.
I don't really know nor care if i'd be classed as "good or bad" at it.
As long as both of us enjoy it.
I also try and not do the same thing every single time wich makes it more of a drag than enjoyable.

My girlfriend and me are happy about the way it goes.
Neither of us have ever rejected having sex with the other one.

So yeah with my current girlfriend it's all perfect.

However in the past i've been annoyed by gf's taking no innitiative.
And taking hours to finnaly want to have sex.
I got called a sex addict by my last gf

Well I'm a female Aspie with an NT male partner and we've been together over 6 yrs and have two sons and at this point, my partner has the lower of the sex drives in our house... to the point if it happens more than once every few months it's a shock. I've always had a high sex drive and this is driving me up the wall at times. I love him and all but it makes things hard at times.