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Grisha
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16 Nov 2011, 6:19 pm

I've always assumed that women universally admire "6-pack" abs and it is a worthwhile goal for a guy to shoot for, and my bodyfat is pretty close to that goal.

Now I'm hearing from someone whose opinion means a lot to me that most women actually like a little bodyfat.

I'm really interested in hearing women's views on the subject - how much or how little fat is optimal for a guy?



OneStepBeyond
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16 Nov 2011, 6:24 pm

who cares what your belly looks like



deconstruction
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16 Nov 2011, 6:26 pm

No, no. The whole "6 pack is a must!" trope is a lie. Well, not a lie, but there are many women, myself included, who don't like muscular men and who don't want their men to have a 6 pack.

It's not that I see Brad Pitt and go "eeeew, gross!", it's just that I don't find it particularly attractive. However, the main reason I dislike muscles is that a guy needs to work out on them. They aren't really natural. I prefer a guy to be as naturally looking as possible. If you're skinny, be skinny. If you're chubby, be chubby. Etc.

Also, if a guy is into gym and working out, it's often the sign he wants his girl to be the same way, and I'm not into it and I don't want to be judged by it. So I think one of the reasons I dislike the 6 pack guys is that they signalize they are into physical appearance and working out a lot, and I'm all for eating chocolate while watching movies. (The two aren't mutually exclusive, I know).

And I've had a bad experience with a muscular, 6 pack guy. So I guess it all contributes to my dislike of it.

Needless to say, it's just my opinion and it's largely influenced by my experience.



DC
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16 Nov 2011, 6:27 pm

I'm not a woman but I'll wear a dress just this once so that I can post.

I used to be very, very fit with almost no body fat, my girlfriend was quite relieved when I stopped climbing and got some fat so that she could cuddle me comfortably.

Before she used to moan that I was like a statue even when asleep.



Aspie_Chav
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16 Nov 2011, 6:29 pm

I feel like having a fit body may account for 20% of a man's attractiveness.



fraac
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16 Nov 2011, 6:37 pm

Beautiful girls care about how you see yourself (and them).



deconstruction
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16 Nov 2011, 6:39 pm

Aspie_Chav wrote:
I feel like having a fit body may account for 20% of a man's attractiveness.


Where did you get that percentage?



mv
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16 Nov 2011, 6:44 pm

deconstruction wrote:
No, no. The whole "6 pack is a must!" trope is a lie. Well, not a lie, but there are many women, myself included, who don't like muscular men and who don't want their men to have a 6 pack.

It's not that I see Brad Pitt and go "eeeew, gross!", it's just that I don't find it particularly attractive. However, the main reason I dislike muscles is that a guy needs to work out on them. They aren't really natural. I prefer a guy to be as naturally looking as possible. If you're skinny, be skinny. If you're chubby, be chubby. Etc.

Also, if a guy is into gym and working out, it's often the sign he wants his girl to be the same way, and I'm not into it and I don't want to be judged by it. So I think one of the reasons I dislike the 6 pack guys is that they signalize they are into physical appearance and working out a lot, and I'm all for eating chocolate while watching movies. (The two aren't mutually exclusive, I know).

And I've had a bad experience with a muscular, 6 pack guy. So I guess it all contributes to my dislike of it.

Needless to say, it's just my opinion and it's largely influenced by my experience.


This is pretty close to how I feel, too. It's a HUGE red flag to me if a man is very, very concerned with his outward appearance to that extent. It usually signals other incompatibilities with me, in my experience.

Additionally, I like a teeny bit of tummy fat, I find it really sensual.



TeaEarlGreyHot
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16 Nov 2011, 6:47 pm

I prefer a little extra. 6-packs are great and all, but muscles are uncomfortable to cuddle up to.

Besides, I'd hate to feel inadequate for not working-out as much as my partner. I work-out daily, too.


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starryeyedvoyager
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16 Nov 2011, 7:14 pm

Women did not care much about me when I was fat, they tend to be a little more friendly towards me now that I am not chubby anymore, so at least I can say that having an energetic appearance has positive impact on interactions (something that actually bothers me), but it's not like I am running around showing my abs to everyone and their grandma, but strangely, when I met with a friend back from high school, she too told me that she prefered a little something to cuddle with. Then again, I'd like to quote Tim Taylor from "Home Improvement":
"Women claim to want a sensitive man, right before they run of with a kickboxer named Dolph."
I could see that women are more emotional than men and therefore, visuals are not as important to them (just look at any kind of erotica, there is a reason to it that about 99% of it is tailored towards a male audience).



1000Knives
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16 Nov 2011, 7:15 pm

To put a spin on this a little, she's really hot and she's a powerlifter.
Image
Image

Female bodybuilders on the other hand, well, we shall not speak of that. Yikes. But, powerlifting and bodybuilding are completely apples to oranges, powerlifting is all about numbers you can lift up, with almost a disregard to looks (ie, they'll actually put on bodyfat when training just to lift higher numbers.)

Oh, my mother says she doesn't like the bodybuilder look either. My sister's never dated a particularly muscular individual either, so yeah. I'm assuming that some women do like it, some women don't. I kinda have a prejudice to think that women who are really into like, really "muscular" bodybuilder men are usually slu*ty women I'd probably not want anyway, but I'm sure there's exceptions around. Vanity attracts vanity I guess.



Ollytheaspie
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16 Nov 2011, 7:18 pm

It's nice to have a bit of muscle, I think most women like a toned man, I take care of myself but I don't have a six pack.



deconstruction
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16 Nov 2011, 7:22 pm

starryeyedvoyager wrote:
I could see that women are more emotional than men and therefore, visuals are not as important to them (just look at any kind of erotica, there is a reason to it that about 99% of it is tailored towards a male audience).


Actually, the whole "women aren't visual" is a myth. And there's another reason why 99% of erotica is targeted to men.



mv
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16 Nov 2011, 7:26 pm

deconstruction wrote:
starryeyedvoyager wrote:
I could see that women are more emotional than men and therefore, visuals are not as important to them (just look at any kind of erotica, there is a reason to it that about 99% of it is tailored towards a male audience).


Actually, the whole "women aren't visual" is a myth. And there's another reason why 99% of erotica is targeted to men.


It's funny, I read "erotica" and I thought "literature". To me, anything that's male-gaze automatically becomes porn (and not erotica). :wink:



deconstruction
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16 Nov 2011, 7:43 pm

mv wrote:
It's funny, I read "erotica" and I thought "literature". To me, anything that's male-gaze automatically becomes porn (and not erotica). :wink:


Right. I meant porn. Erotica is another matter, and, in fact, most of erotica is targeted to women. (But so is slash fan fiction). :P



Ilka
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16 Nov 2011, 8:29 pm

That depends on the type of women you are trying to attract. Some women are very vein an assign too much importance to looks, theirs and of their partners. If you want to attract that kind of women then you have to take care of your appearance.

I cant care less about six packs. I mean, it is nice to see a man with a nice body, but what attracts me more is not the way he looks without his shirt on, but his brain. I feel more attaracted to an intelligent man than to a fit one.