being interupted makes me feel invisible

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My boyfriend, NEVER and I mean NEVER, lets me complete a full sentence unless other people are around. I really don't think I can take it much more. Your mate is supposed to make you feel loved and respected, but he makes me feel completely invisible and unworthy. Nothing I say ever matters, beause, well, he has never let me finish a sentence to even get to know what it is I am gonna say.

How can he even know me if he won't hear me?

Why should I stay with someone who constantly dismisses me just because "he" loves me so much?

He makes me feel like crap.

Isn't it logical to avoid people and situations that make you feel like crap?

Being ignored is like never ending suffering and I just can't wait to get away from him and talk to someone, ANYONE who will listen so I can feel like I exsist again...

Just a rant, Thanks for listening.

Next time he does it, take a deep breath and say calmly but in a voice loud enough to overshadow his "Oh, excuse me for talking while you were interrupting. Go ahead. I'll finish when you're done"

If you don't feel like you can do that, then let him finish and take up right exactly where you left off. Midsentence, midword, anything. Like you didn't hear him.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

Thanks Olive mom, I am gunna start trying different stargeties. I do love him, but I feel ten times lonlier when he is around then when he is not here. It is soooooooo hard. I wanted a boyfriend so I wouldn't be lonely. Now I am lonlier. I go to bed alone every night because he is married to his computer. We were trying for a fresh start but I am loosing all hope.

This is an as*hole behavior.

I'd directly confront him, interrupting every time is a complete lack of manners.

and i'd play 'you'll sleep on the couch tonight' card if I were you.

Tell him (maybe in an email so he can't interrupt you?) how it makes you feel when he interrupts you, and tell him that it will be hard to continue your relationship if he continues to interrupt you like that. I try to avoid "hinting."

If he is doing this sort of thing to you only when there are no other people around, I would suspect it is a conscious act to put you down and "keep you in your place." If he behaved this way with anyone, then I would suspect it was just a bad habit on his part, but it sounds like there is some deeper issue that is pushing him to do this to you.

He needs to be willing to listen to you. If he won't, it tells you that he doesn't value you as a person, but only as someone he can put down to make himself feel better. A relationship without mutual respect and good will is likely to be more damaging than helpful. It's possible that if you two can have an honest discussion and he doesn't try to prevent you from discussing your concerns, you may be able to work this out.

I hope you can work it out with him, but if he is unwilling to change, I hope you will find somebody better.

Sometimes people do this because they're worried they won't get to say what they have to say, or you might throw too many points at them at once so they feel compelled to respond to them.

Others interrupt because they have difficulty determining when the other person is done talking. There might be a short pause and they think that is their cue to speak. Additionally, they might come from environments where they had to get in what they wanted to say quickly, or they wouldn't get a chance to say it.

Next time he does it tell him very firmly to stop interrupting you and let you finish. Tell him he will get his chance to respond when you're done. If you have to talk over him to say this and tell him you're not going to listen to what he has to say if he has interrupted you.

You really need to let people who have a problem interrupting that know that it is not acceptable, and that they will get their chance to speak.

I also hate being interrupted. My family used to pretty much tune out my monologueing and would interrupt me with a completely unrelated sentance when I was in the middle of a story. I guess you can't blame them since I kind of tend to ramble a lot.. but I have things to say.. and I'd like them to be heard. To this day it irritates me when someone does it mainly because of the way my family treated me when I was young.

HOWEVER, I'd also like to point out that there are several aspie traits that can contribute to other people "interrupting":

1. As mentioned above, a tendency to monologue. If it's hard for someone else to get a word in edgewise, then anything they ever try to say will be an interruption.

2. Somewhat related to number 1 - it can be hard for aspies to understand the natural ebb and flow of conversation and therefore the other person's natural "tempo" which may be perfectly normal, is interrupting to aspies. Because their conversational flow is abnormal

3. Sometimes people on the spectrum tend to take time to process what they are about to say before they say it. My husband is like this and as a result has a speech delay. For that reason, he will at times claim that I interrupted him first when I started speaking audibly before he did because he had started the process of "speaking" in his mind long before the actual words come out.

Just break up with him. If that's the way he naturally treats you then don't bother trying to change him, just move on.