Aspie boyfriend moving in with me

Post Reply New Topic

So here's the story...

I've been dating my boyfriend for about 6 months, and about a month ago, we started discussing living together. Since I graduated college, I've lived with parents off and on between college and an internship I did for Disney, but I officially moved out and got my own 1 bedroom apartment in March. My boyfriend has lived with his parents during school breaks, and shared a house with a few people while he was at college. It turns out he is going to have to stay another semester, but did not know this until it was too late to renew his lease. My apartment is 30 minutes from his school, while his parents live 2 hours away, so once school starts again in July, he's going to move in with me. No brainer, right?

Well, the thing is...I'm incredibly excited and incredibly terrified at the same time.

Moving in with your significant other is complicated enough, but since I'm an NT and he's potentially an Aspie, I'm very worried we will drive each other nuts.

I would love any advice from other "mixed couples" that are living together.

Thanks!

I've never lived with a partner so to speak, but she'd often stay for months at a time, the biggest thing for me was that she knew when I needed a little head room, it's nice to be alone with your own thoughts every now and again. Other then that I enjoyed it when she was "living" here as it meant loads of cuddles on the sofa, with a lame film ^_^

The cuddles on the couch are what I'm excited about!

I'm mostly worried about getting in the way of his routine and him getting frustrated if I leave the bathroom light on or something. Compromise is one thing, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life walking on eggshells while he gets to do or say whatever he wants.

I totally understand about privacy and space, though. This is exactly why I wanted a bedroom door when everyone was telling me to get a studio! haha

Well it was a tad hard at first, as you'd expect with sharing space with anyone and we'd both get under each others feet every now and again.

I would of hated it if my gf felt she had to walk on egg shells around me because of my AS tho. Yeah I hate somethings being done in certain ways and stuffs but you both get used to each other eventually and if you don't thats where the compromising comes into play, I hated not being able to do thing MY way but I loved her enough to let some things slide, or if something wasn't done right I'd do it my way super sneaky

You just have to take it slow as it's a pretty big step for both of you, and you'll most likely find it's not as daunting as it initially seems.

Tried it only once and it was one big disaster although it was my apartment and i let my NT gf move in there. It was so traumatic that i would never do it again. I'm just not able to have another person around and at any point everything she did caused a severe stress reaction, though she did her best to take care. I can only live together with my cats.