Anyone have ideas

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Do any of you do this?

I find myself at romantic moments noticing odd details that sorta ruin the moment if my partner notices.

For example, last evening we were fooling around and the shadow of the curtain caught my eye (it looked just like greenland) .

Do NTs do this too? Do I need to see someone on avoiding getting close or is this apie normal.

Any input appreciated

Ehh... honestly I've never seen a NT do that... before I came here I attributed such things to my artistic curiousities but now I'm not entirely sure...

My guess is it's perfectly normal... well as normal as we get, anyway.

I remember the morning the war in Iraq broke out, I was sharing a hotel room with someone who was then my longtime girlfriend. We were taking kind of a vacation of sorts. Anyhow, when we found out what was going on, she turned on the TV in the background, but eventually we wound up kissing passionately. As an Aspie, I can't really drown out background noise effectively, though, and have an intense interest in politics. So, there I was kissing her with my back to the TV, and all of the sudden I hear a voice I recognize, pull back and say excitedly, "Is that Tony Blair?!?!" (It was, in case anyone is wondering. ). In retrospect, it was kind of amusing and I'd imagine that my now ex-girlfriend probably thinks of it that way now, but I think she found it rather off-putting at the time.

An NT often assumes that when someone does something like that, it is indicative of a lack of interest or positive feeling about them, or even indicative of a reluctance to be physical at all. Of course, I think for many Aspies, when they act in such a fasion, that's not the case at all. I know it wasn't for me. I was in love with this girl and enjoyed kissing her, I just noticed the Prime Minister of the UK speaking about an important world event and reacted instinctively without considering the situation (Sometimes impulsivity can be a part of Asperger's, some of us have trouble filtering thoughts and just blurt things out). It really boils down to a communications difficulty, NTs think Aspies are trying to imply something that they're not implying.

I don't know what can really be done about that except for clear communication. If you care for someone, emphasize it and make sure they're aware of it and explain in great detail when they don't seem to understand or misinterpret something. I'll do this many times to the point of it being very repetitive. Sometimes that can backfire, because people can find it annoying, corny, or over-the-top. However, in the end, if I cared for someone, I'd be more comfortable with her dumping me because she thought I was too expressive or forthright than because she didn't know how much I really cared. I made that decision early on. I want to be rejected for my true feelings and who I really am rather than being rejected because I'm too reserved or hiding myself. It's more true to me, and more in line with what I believe the ideal relationship entails -- which includes things like honesty, communication, emotional intimacy, etc..