Proper eye contact for females?

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1000Knives
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14 Jul 2012, 12:11 am

I don't quite understand what's proper eye contact for females. For males, what I generally do is, when they try to make eye contact with me or stare at me, I just look at them until they look away. I look away sometimes, too, but generally I try to look at them until they look away first, because basically it shows you're dominant/not gonna get punked by them. At least that's my understanding of things.

But for females, I think if you were to do this, it'd be negative, as it's not like a "power" thing with eye contact as I understand it. So when they look me in the eyes, what am I supposed to do?

Maybe it's less eye contact I'm talking about, I'm not talking about eye contact during a conversation, but when you're say, 10 feet away from another person, and they're looking at you. What is appropriate for that? I don't think I'll change my protocol for males, but I usually look away when females try to eye contact size me up (at least that's what I'm perceiving it as) now I look a little longer, then try to look away a bit more casually, but what's the proper protocol for this? Obviously you don't wanna stare them down like guys, but you don't want to shyly look away either?



Chronos
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14 Jul 2012, 1:17 am

1000Knives wrote:
I don't quite understand what's proper eye contact for females. For males, what I generally do is, when they try to make eye contact with me or stare at me, I just look at them until they look away. I look away sometimes, too, but generally I try to look at them until they look away first, because basically it shows you're dominant/not gonna get punked by them. At least that's my understanding of things.

But for females, I think if you were to do this, it'd be negative, as it's not like a "power" thing with eye contact as I understand it. So when they look me in the eyes, what am I supposed to do?

Maybe it's less eye contact I'm talking about, I'm not talking about eye contact during a conversation, but when you're say, 10 feet away from another person, and they're looking at you. What is appropriate for that? I don't think I'll change my protocol for males, but I usually look away when females try to eye contact size me up (at least that's what I'm perceiving it as) now I look a little longer, then try to look away a bit more casually, but what's the proper protocol for this? Obviously you don't wanna stare them down like guys, but you don't want to shyly look away either?


In the NT world, in most casual daily interactions, when people make eye contact the proper thing to do is usually to give a brief slight smile or nod to acknowledge the other person and convey politeness, and then continue about your business. This goes for men and women both. If a woman you find attractive makes eye contact with you, you should smile bigger and say hello.



aspiemike
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14 Jul 2012, 1:17 am

I prefer not to think about it. I am still working on trying to relax myself and look like I am not staring. I figure if I want to make eye contact with someone, I will and I will do what I can to make sure I look relaxed if I am open to communicating with them. This kind of goes for both males and females.



ValentineWiggin
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14 Jul 2012, 5:16 pm

I have yet to be able to meet someone's eyes,
other than BF, and not even then when I'm upset.

My mom is an exception.

I was trying to think as how I, personally, would want someone to look at me,
but the honest answer is...I wouldn't.


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curlyfry
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14 Jul 2012, 6:13 pm

No more than two seconds. If you want to make eye contact and your interested crack a slight smile and look away then look back.



aSKperger
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14 Jul 2012, 6:44 pm

Quote:
So when they look me in the eyes, what am I supposed to do?


Smile :!: :idea: That's the best you can do. If it is possible for you. You can never make a mistake with smile (except at funeral etc). No need to wide open one, just move your mouth corner slightly.
It truly is a miracle. Wish I use it more often :oops: