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I have a problem with women.

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Australia
Snowy Owl
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21 Sep 2012, 11:02 am

All my life ive attracted women and i didnt know why i rejected so many until i finally got a diagnosis. ive only had one gf that lasted for about a month and im 27.

Sometimes i just feel really bad how to make a conversation but i always seem to outsmart them. and i really dont think women like that. Im just very blunt sometimes and change my subjects constantly.

so my question is am i meant to act dumb? like should i act a little less intelligent?



Vomelche
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21 Sep 2012, 11:11 am

Depends what kind of women you want to attract. Also women think more emotionally, so its sometimes more how you say it rather then what you say. A negative tone is generally not welcome.



Prof_Pretorius
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21 Sep 2012, 11:16 am

You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


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thewhitrbbit
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21 Sep 2012, 11:17 am

There's a difference between acting dumb and situationally appropriate conversation.

If your at a bar with friends meeting girls, probably not going to discuss physics at the plank length.

Now you know why, now you can work on improving. :)



Australia
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21 Sep 2012, 11:35 am

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


yes exactly i really have to change this habit



Prof_Pretorius
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21 Sep 2012, 11:43 am

Australia wrote:
Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


yes exactly i really have to change this habit


I speak from experience. Trust me, I have some of the greatest regrets of my life stemming from this.


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Australia
Snowy Owl
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21 Sep 2012, 11:59 am

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
Australia wrote:
Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


yes exactly i really have to change this habit


I speak from experience. Trust me, I have some of the greatest regrets of my life stemming from this.


yeah u seem very intelligent and knowledgable



Australia
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21 Sep 2012, 12:01 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
Australia wrote:
Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


yes exactly i really have to change this habit


I speak from experience. Trust me, I have some of the greatest regrets of my life stemming from this.


yeah u seem very intelligent and knowledgable



eric76
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21 Sep 2012, 12:48 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


Or "if you find me attractive, you must be really desperate."



Tequila
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21 Sep 2012, 12:49 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive.


I know you're a bloke, and I'm a straight bloke, but I could kiss you right now. Thank you so much - it ain't just me that feels like this!



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21 Sep 2012, 12:53 pm

eric76 wrote:
Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


Or "if you find me attractive, you must be really desperate."


Or really drunk. :lol:
On a side note, ever hear the mating call of the Southern Belle?
"Ooh, Ah ayum soooo duh-runk!"


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WontGiveUp
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21 Sep 2012, 1:16 pm

As someone previously said, it depends upon who you want to attract. I would say don't dumb it down and keep being exactly who you are and someday the person who appreciates you for your intelligent conversation will stumble upon you.

Keep in mind, if you act less intelligent and dumb it down, you will attract someone. But, eventually you will have to drop the act and be yourself, so why not just be yourself from day 1 ??

Of course, if you just want a short term fling, then perhaps dumbing it down is a good strategy, knowing that you don't expect/want a long term relationship out of it.

Just my .02! :)


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21 Sep 2012, 1:47 pm

Prof_Pretorius wrote:
You have probably not alienated women by intelligent conversation. Unless of course, you've gotten feedback from the ladies saying "I never know what you're talking about."
You might have fallen into the ASpie problem of rejecting someone who finds you attractive. It's the old Groucho Marx joke "I've never wanted to belong to any country club that would have me as a member."
In short, a woman approaches you and you react "if you find me attractive, you must have lousy taste in men."


Oh my... this is brilliant. Thank you alot, I have never seen it from this perspective. This is exactly the reason why I always get suspicious when an attractive woman starts getting an interest in me... I always feel like: "Where's the catch? I seem like an odd choice for a woman that could settle with something ALOT better than me." I guess I finally figured a part of me out... cheers mate.