Why is telling your partner that your Autistic a bad thing?

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As far as I know, I thought love and relationships are about understanding and acceptance?
Plus if your partner left because your Autistic or an Aspie or you have PPD, wouldn't they be the bad person in all this for just judging and stereotyping without considering the effects. Not to mention how much of a bad reason this would be...
Furthermore, hiding it more or less makes those who don't understand reason to suspect you up to no good due to being too secretive.

I think it sometimes has to do with preconceived ideas about concepts and labels. If you tell a potential partner you're great with computers, don't like loud music and need solitude they may be accepting or welcoming of that, if you told the same person you're autistic they would make excuses and leave.

I agree there is no sense in hiding who you are, that would be pointless. People shouldn't judge and stereotype others, but unfortunately they do.

I would imagine if I told someone I had Aspergers they would Google it, read all the nasty comments made about AS men (there is VERY little positive written about Aspies) and be scared away like you have the plague or have some crippling mental illness. If on the other hand I tell them I'm not a social butterfly, am obsessive at times and am insanely loyal and honest they would almost certainly be much more accepting. Sadly most individuals idea of research is 10 minutes on Google or YouTube.

If someone didn't know about my Autism, how are they in any sense "my partner"?

Asperger's affects every moment of my life, from social interaction to my perceptions of my sensory environment.

If they hadn't noticed I was quite different, I'd in all likelihood conclude them oblivious to the point of being obtuse.

Well I dont think you should tell them, unless it really starts to bother them and they want to know why. Otherwise, it will come off as a bad thing if you just throw it in the open and make it seem like a negative thing. You could reach a certain point of intimacy where you could tell them and they will be ready for it.

Because autism is still thought of as only having the "classical" traits. You tell anybody you have autism these days and you're able to speak and don't have any weird obsessions, and they'll laugh at you.

If you are in an exclusive relationship, and it's getting serious, you should tell them.

But you shouldn't tell them anything about it while you are in the early stages of dating. Don't tell them at all until you two are exclusive.

Your actions should speak for themselves. You should be you, not a label.

What if the partner doesn't believe you have autism and says there is no way you could have it, because you are too "normal" for it to him or her?

Or says something like "disorders don't matter and are irrelevant"?

I'm normal enough at first glance, but anyone who knows me to the point of being in a relationship (assumes a certain knowledge of my personality and history is required for a romantic relationship with me) will probably have guessed by now. Plus I hate keeping secrets. Of course, unless they ask me beforehand, I usually wait until some kind of steady relationship has been established before letting the secret out. The three relationships I've had thus far have all been like this, and each time my other half at the time has said something along the lines of "I guessed as much because of X, but what the hell you're still a nice guy." Kyuuchan of course is no exception. In fact between her and my two exes she's been the most accepting of my shortcomings as an Aspie, a boyfriend, and a person in general.

Personally, anyone not understanding enough to accept this fact after establishing a relationship with me or another autistic individual isn't understanding enough to BE in said relationship. Of course, timing is key if you plan to reveal the information yourself, but unless they A) Already know, B) Guessed but didn't know for sure, or C) Had no clue but accepts it and says it doesn't matter to them, I'd break up now, because whatever relationship you DO have with such a person will end quickly - and it will NOT end well.

I would think to have a sutainable relationship you would want to help your partner understand you. Seems like you could skip a lot of uneeded conflict.

If telling your partner that you are autistic is a bad thing, then you have the wrong partner.

I wanted to know all about my boyfriend's autism. I wanted to know his quirks, what he liked, what he didn't like, what bothered him, anything that I should keep in mind while dining with him, any foods that grossed him out, anything he was obsessing over. I have spent the past three months learning everything there is to learn about autism in the hopes of achieving the end goal of being the best girlfriend that I can be to him. I have always tried to be very sensitive to his unique needs. It's just what he deserves, and everyone else on the spectrum deserves a loving, patient partner, as well.

Personally, it's not something I would say on the first date. I can understand that if you're on the first date and you think you seem awkward to them, you want them to know why that is. I just think that if you come out with it too early, people might get a bad impression not because they're a bad person, but because it's natural and they simply don't know any better. It's also a chance to really find out if a potential partner would mind your quirks without needing a label to justify it. If they do mind, it's just a signal that it really is a problem for them and at some point in the relationship it's going to wear them out.