I was dumped yesterday.

Post Reply New Topic

I am now having a massive anxiety attack. I have been getting them in various degrees since yesterday when we talked and I was subsequently dumped. I'm panicking because the pain is so bad and there is nothing I can do to alleviate it! I get this overwhelming feeling that I am not real or the world is not real and everything feels like it's just a figment of my imagination or something. It's not right to say it feels like watching a film because when you watch a film you know it's not real and what is real. I have no reality.
I don't even think it's that I miss him particularly but the fact that change is really hard for me.
And of course the fact that he told me I was pestering him when I asked why he wanted to brake up with me. He didn't want to explain it because he claimed to have explained it several times and I will just never understand.
I feel like an idiot!
I don't know what I want you all to do with this, maybe I just needed to write something.
I'm in really bad shape!

I know that feeling all too well... find comfort where you can - with friends or possibly a furry pet.

Just hang in there... time helps, but so does doing the things you enjoy.

I'm so sorry to hear...

As BlueMax said, it might be good to find comfort in friends or family as well as things you enjoy doing, and let the time heal the wounds. It has to be a very difficult phase for you, but with some time, try to think of it as an end of one era and the beginning of new opportunities. You shouldn't feel stupid or bad... Sometimes it's better to let go (it doesn't mean that there's anything particularly wrong in either person, just they don't work well enough together) and sometimes these situations can be talked through, if the bond between the two is strong enough.

Churchill: "When you're going through Hell, keep going"


*Big Hug* for you and all the best with everything.

Thank you both for your caring answers!

I'm so sorry. If you like animals, spending time with them might help. generally though, spoil yourself. Be as nice to yourself as you would be to your best friend if he/she were going through this and do not feel guilty about it! And also...writing/art helps me.

I give you lots of hugs.

Focus on a goal. And hang in there. Time heals most wounds

Awwwe, it's hug time

Thank you everyone! I really appreciate your kindness!

I feel better today. I still get a big fat dissociative anxiety attack when I think of him. But I'll be spending time with friends again today and maybe get some really unhealthy stuff to eat tonight

Salome, might I suggest a "sister thread" on this in the Haven? You're likely to get more guaranteed supportive words there.

That said, what you went through is awful and I'm sorry it's affecting you this way. Stay strong.

I'm so sorry to hear this, as it happened to me recently but all will be well. I know its easy for us to say that but it takes to people to make love work. Sometimes YOU are not the issue, people break up for lots of reasons. SO, try not to take it so hard. Start thinking about the type of person you desire, like one is communicates with you, chooses to build with you and cares about your feelings Hopefully both of our hearts will heal soon. Sending you healing....

I can completely relate. There are lots of supportive people on here that you can talk to. Try to go onto the random thread and distract yourself from the pain. Also, don't give yourself time to think about it; make sure you keep your mind preoccupied with something else. I remember this all too well, and the only way I could deal with it was by leaving and staying away from home.

On the upside, to be dumped is an act of sheer honesty on the part of the dumper.


That, unfortunately, is more rare than a good relationship.

Hi Salome,

Being dumped is a hard thing to go through. I am glad you are spending time with friends

Try and distract yourself with something fun - maybe a few seasons worth of your favourite show? Or the terrific suggestion of quality time with a pet - a purring cat can be v soothing.

Take care

What your are feeling is what any human being feels when they get dumped. It often makes you feel like you are a pile of dog crap when it reality, you just were not a good fit to begin with. There is nothing wrong with either of you. You just were not right for each other.

The problem with this situation is that the guy tried to give you hints but they were not the most communication effective. He could have told you why he felt like you were not a good fit.