I am a girl with a girlfriend who I suspect has AS

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I love this girl so much that it hurts. She's not diagnosed or if she is she hasn't told me her family are very close and I adore them as well. I realise now that the things that attracted me to her could very well be aspie traits. She has the fine motor skill deficits which i have too. She is very passionate about her hobbies she has a deep knowledge of the things that she takes an interest in. We have hobbies in common which is how we met. her voice is often quite flat except if she is really happy. After a certain amount of time in social situations she withdraws and will go and pat a nearby dog or cat. We have great sex but it's not as high on her priority list as her hobbies so it doesn't happen that often. I would like a touch more.... we have had misunderstandings already where I've expressed disappointment about a lack of physical affection and she has just said she doesn't understand why it seems complicated. I'm convinced that if she knew she was an aspie then she would understand there is a reason why it's complicated.

I love her so much but I'm a bit scared that we won't be able to make it work.

Why is it complicated? You want more physical affection, it something overshadowed by her interests according to your description. Sounds pretty easy to understand to me.

Avoid making things more complicated unnecessarily.

Maybe it isn't so much that she is distracted by her interest, more that she is not in the mood and that being the case she would rather do something else. Chicken and egg scenario. Either way it is not that complicated.

I don't think her knowing she has AS will necessarily change sex drive. What do expect to happen?

There are a number of other things it could be besides being AS, always reluctant to give an opinion from an online account and there really isn't that much information anyway.

It certainly helped my relationship when my wife found out I had Aspergers. She realized that no matter what she did, I wouldn't change, as my mind was hard wired to work a certain way. So, she stopped trying to fix things that weren't really broken. With this major paradigm shift in our relationship, I could actually enjoy my special interests and have more fun time together. She wasted a lot of time trying to analyze why my family relationships weren't normal and felt threatened by the time I spent with my special interests. She realized that my special interests allowed me to recover from the stresses of a full time job with too much social interaction. She loved to travel so we went somewhere every weekend until her health wouldn't allow it.