meeting a girl at a party on thursday

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hello all.

a friend is introducing me to a girl at a party on thursday.

the party is not my concern. i generally do well in large warm houses with a lot of people in them as i can slip into little corners and have one on one conversations with dear friends (of which i am sure there will be at least four).

my problem is that ive only successfully pursued one woman into short-term dating. ive pursued many to the point of them running away from me.

while this may sound typical of our semi-shared experience, i am not one to become 'obsessed.' i mean, it has happened, but generally it does not. i am not sure where the failing is at, but i dont think it is in 'obsession.'

im afraid i dont so much believe in 'mutual liking.' i am starting to realize this post may be better suited for the haven.

other than asking her about her interests and reframing what i hear back to her, sharing compliments about her, is there something i should add? a touch on the arm, as i understand it. ugh. perhaps i should re-title this post 'how do i act more like a warm person?'

i guess i dont understand the 'getting to know you' phase. for the most part, i have no attraction to girls. i identify as queer for this reason. when i do get attracted, isnt it logical that cuddling should happen? hand-holding? do i really have to get to know someone before wanting this to happen? when it doesnt happen that fast, i get stuck. way stuck. not 'in the friend zone' stuck, but like 'what do i do next' stuck. (im not talking about sex here, please take note)

i just saw a picture. shes pretty. shoot