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What do you think?

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 09 Feb 2013, 5:50 pm, edited 2 times in total.

You probably struck a nerve on some of the posters now.

it struck mine:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt219411.html

in some cases, i'd agree. i was working with some men and women and we were discussing dating. one woman called her date cheap for complaining of the costs after he chose an expensive restaurant. she had a third glass of wine and he wasn't impressed. i suggested she should have paid for half of the bill! she said she would have paid for the second date, but i thought it was a likely story, considering that she seemed so difficult to get a second date with.

i think that men paying for dates is an outdated concept, but it seems to be lingering in our dating world. i'd like to see that overhauled altogether.

Let me help you with that.



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A cheap guy usually wouldn't choose an expensive restaurant in the first place.

yeah it really didn't add up. i emphasised the fact that i consider cheapness to be an asset. how else could i save money? i don't throw that stuff around, so i sure as heck don't want to date someone who does.

EDIT: i should add that she doesn't talk to me anymore.

Anyway, any lady wants to share my dinner?

I think it seems cheap if a guy doesn't want to pay. However at this point in my life even as much as I like free stuff it would make me uncomfortable to let a guy pay my way because in the past when I was younger I've had guys act like they were owed sex if they so much as bought me a $2 drink right after meeting me.

I've actually been on very few dates in my life and even fewer where the guy paid.

This is not the 1950's any more. Women are more than capable of paying for at least half. That's why my boyfriend and I take turns paying for stuff. It's a stupid sexist convention and I have no idea why people still adhere to it.

I'd be like "Look, I can't afford to pay over $10 for you cuz I'm broke."

I don't mind splitting the bill, I'd just wish it would be something we discuss when we're organising the date instead of when the bill is dropped on our table.

That would be the rude part for me; the fact that he would wait until the last minute to spring it on me. As if to imply he thinks I'm a gold digger sort who wouldn't have said yes to the date if he mentioned it beforehand.

It wouldn't matter as I always bring enough cash for my share of the bill anyway (I always go with the assumption that the bill will be split). But I wouldn't agree to a second date with someone who has negative presumptions about me being a gold digger who never pays her way.

At least that's honest... Thats better than when she knows perfectly well, right from first sight, she's not interested in him - no "spark" - but sticks around for a free fancy meal.



Makes perfect sense - I like the way you think.

Me - I'm going to continue paying for first dates - but those will be something much simpler and cheaper than a meal - like coffee and nibbles, etc.
If things get to the second date, I'll try to bring up the subject... hard to be smooth about it when Aspies aren't know for being all that smooth.

I'd probably take any potential date to an Indian place I know. It's quite easy to eat well on $10ish per person there. Well, actually, if you're a normal person and not a complete pig like me, eat on like $3.75 (cost of their kebab roll that gives you more food than a $5 footlong.) Plus they give free salad and water. SO THEORETICALLY, we could have a really awesome date on $10 for the both of us, but I'd be like "No you can't have Coka Cola, have some free water instead!"

And this is why I don't have a girlfriend.

EDIT:
I've not come up with much of a contingency plan if said girl doesn't like Indian food. I'm thinking "well, c'mon, give it a try, it'll be fun!" a bunch of times. And "If you don't like it, at least have some rice and naans." But in all likelihood, I'd not wanna date a girl who can't eat international food, as it's like all of what I eat, and if I get married I want a girl who can cook (for srs) and has a better idea of food than pressing 2:00 on a microwave or going to McDonalds. But that Indian restaurant, the way it works, you order rice for about $5, and then you order, say, Chicken Tikka for $8-11, and the plate is big enough for 2 people to eat when you combine it with rice and naan bread. So don't get soda, and then you can come out under $20. That and you're sharing food and stuff, instead of getting individual meals.

Maybe my idea of cooking burgers in the park, and again saying "Yo like, I'm really broke, either homemade burgers or McDonalds or Taco Bell."

Again, why I have no girlfriend.

I thought the "rule" was that whomever asked the other on the date had to pay?

One more reason why many women will hint at but not actually ask?