To the men

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I'm curious, are you bothered by your girlfriend talking to other men or being with them as friends?

It sounds like he's making a pretty unreasonable demand. What's next, him saying he really doesn't want you talking to any guys, ever? If you have a problem with it, you should try discussing that problem with him. If he doesn't even want to discuss it then you should ask yourself if he's worth it.

Sure, a guy may get jealous or uncomfortable if you talk to other guys, if you give them a reason. Some guys are also insecure about themselves, and may think that if their girlfriends talk to other guys, they'll just up and leave if the other guy "seems better." He may have had someone cheat on him in the past, which might cause similar reactions. Even if that's the case, its unfair of him to treat you with the same level of suspicion.

If you value your happiness, something needs to change. In this case, he needs to learn to trust you. If he doesn't trust you, the relationship will eventually fail, or both of you will be miserable the rest of your lives.

He may need to see a counselor. His lack of trust may be root back to early childhood.

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Oye Vey.

Tis a hard thing to give advice on.

Okay I guess I should have kept my post short and only asked:


So are you bothered by your girlfriend talking to other men or being with them as friends?


I need a straight answer to see if my friend is right or not. No straight answer then I'm going to assume, the answer is 'no' and men aren't bothed by their ladies seeing other guys and it's just him only. Or just start another thread using that question as a poll. Then I'll get straight answers then hopefully.

I don't think this has anything to do with him having Aspergers. It is common for a boyfriend or girlfriend not to want their significant other to be too chummy with someone that might seduce them. That's what it boils down to he doesn't want the competition of other guys giving his girl attention.

When Dear Abby is presented with the same question she suggests you include your partner in the friendships with others. You have to ask yourself why are these guys with girlfriends looking for online friendships? Once you are in a REAL relationship with someone in person you need to cut your strings to online make believe friendships. You need to be concentrating your energies on developing a good relationship with the man in your life and quit playing around with pen pals. There is something very disturbing about someone that concentrates more on people they will never meet and neglect the real people in their lives.

Sure its ok for you to have your own friends but it needs to be real people that you and boyfriend can hang out with or talk to together. After a certain point it is cheating even when you aren't having sex with them. Your boyfriend needs to chill out and not be throwing things but he certainly does have the right to be bothered by this. All you need to do is tell your online friends the situation and not just drop them one day unexplained. They should be able to include their girlfriend in friendships with you too otherwise their is something very fishy with them looking for female friends online when they already have a woman in their life.

His conduct isn't really called for but... How would you feel if he started calling other girls? I don't condone his actions, but that is a question to consider.

I told him he can talk to other girls online. I told him he can keep talking to that jenny girl in Australia. But he says he likes talking to only one girl and focusing on one girl and that's me. Once he met me, he stopped talking to her. he only talked to ehr because he felt sorry for her. She is badly scarred because her ex poured gas on her and lit her on fire and now is in prison for it and she won't go out and meet anyone and socialize. She only does it online and she won't show anyone her pictures. I kind of found it hard to believe but hey you can still live after being badly burned. I have read about it and seen it in pictures at my high school.


In 1999, some girl got in a car accident from being hit by a 17 year old drunk driver and her car got caught on fire and burned her and left her covered in 60 percent scars and has had to have many operations. now she is ugly and needs to be cared for. This health class printed pictures of it off the internet and made a poster about it and hung it up in the hallway to show what drunk driving does to people. It showed a picture of the guy too of who caused the wreck and it said now 21 he will never forgive himself for what he did to Jackie and her life. This was back when I was 17. If that happeend to me, I wouldn't want to live.

But I found it hard to believe this Jenny girl can still type and all but she could be using some device that does the typing for her. You'll never know.

Insecure is one word for it.
Telling you who you can be friends with, becoming angry and throwing stuff around the room when you don't go along with his suggestion? Beware, this may become an abusive relationship.

The one from Idaho was going to give me diapers he didn't want and I asked if I can have them and he said yes but I'd have to give him something in return and when I didn't know what he was talking about when he said "Get on with it" he told me I was naive and when he told me he meant sex, I said 'forget it' and then he apologized and said he was just kidding. So I said "how about I take you around Spokane and show you the benny and joon locations and take you to Fegusons in return" and he said 'sounds good to me.' But my partner told me he wasn't kidding and he was serious. So the deal was set. Then he was disappointed I found a guy and now we won't be able to do that and I said we still could if it was alright with my partner. He'd be with me if I did my deal so it be us three together. I have told him he can bring his gf when we meet but he refuses. He doesn't want her to know.



My partner and I have a problem we need to work out and he did tell me we'll work stuff out if there is a problem in our relationship. I don't have to meet anymore guys I met online because I'm taken, I think I can live with that. One guy is enough for me in real life. But I met the guy in Idaho in real life before I met my partner and things clicked between us. It didn't with me and the other guy because he already has a gf. I just have problems with dumping people I've already been talking to. Luckily my partner doesn't have a problem with me talking to the ones i've known for a few years who have AS.

Your bf is making very unreasonable demands. Ask him why he perceives your online chatting as flirting with other men. If he keeps with this, break up with him & tell him that he is an unreasonable jerk who deserves a break-up.