friendship with a married woman ( good or bad idea)

Post Reply New Topic

so, I've been talking and hanging around this one lady (27 year old) and she has no problem with me,
she doesn't think That Im a creep or annoying. and she says ''hi'' to me first, before I do.
So I asked her out, but she told me she was married (I really need to look at women hands and
check for a ring) but that was a few weeks ago, and she doesn't have any problem talking with me.
So, I ask if I could ever go to her place and have a party with her and her husband, like a get together.
She say she has no problem with it and I could to her apartment and have a party with her and her husband,
and some of her friends. Sound good, right. Well, Im actual worried. I would love to form a friendship with her
but Im afraid that her husband would not take too kind to me. That he might get upset, that I am talking to her
and wanting to hang out with her.

I've been talking with her for a few months now. really nice lady, like her alot (in a friendship way of course)
Idealy want to form a more closer friendship with her but I don't know if her husband would be ok with me,
being good friends with his wife.
so, should I form a very close friendship with a married woman or is it a bad idea to form a close friendship with
a married woman

If you feel you can get past labelling and objectifying their marital status and talk to the woman as if she were a friend, not "your married friend that's a girl" then yeah I don't see how it can be a problem. I don't think the husband will be worried about you as such, if anything irritated if you overdo it. So at the party I would suggest doing what friends do, saying hi how are you then mingling with the other guests.

Yes, there are men like that.




She might.



You say you just want to be friends with her, but since you asked her out, you wanted to date her. Not knowing at the time that she's married, that was OK, but now you know. It's time to drop it. Honestly when a man wants to date a woman his feelings are not really that of just a friend. Men want to date women who they are sexually attracted to or women who they think they might become attracted to.

You may be able to fool yourself, that now, all you want with her is just a closer friendship, but that's not really true. We can't turn off our sexual attraction to a particular person just because we have discovered that they're already married.

Really, very few married people develop close relationships with single people of the opposite sex; because when they do, it can lead to affairs. (That's how affairs 'just happen'.)

Between having friendships from before marriage and new friendships with same sex friends plus a spouse, there is little need to lead oneself into temptation by forming close and ever closer friendships with single folks of the opposite sex.

It's OK to enjoy your light interactions with her when you run into her. But trying to get together with her for partying isn't a good idea. That's messing around with temptation. And most likely her husband will not like it because of the potential attraction factor. Bill, duh, you know this; you're just looking for someone to say something that might help you to continue to fool yourself, because you're starting to strongly suspect you're on the wrong track with this. Can ya get a witness? No, not from me.

Last edited by MountainLaurel on 20 Mar 2013, 10:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Im not going to sleep with her. I don't sleep with married women. But I do like her as a friend. Your right, maybe I shouldn't get too close to her just keep the friendship very minor and not go to the best friend area.

Stop bullshitting us and yourself.. You want to be near her because you're attracted to her, it comes across in the way you talk about her.
The fact that you're even worried about being "friends" with her tells me there's a problem.
Leave it alone, don't push her away but don't get 'closer' until you are sure you're over the attraction to her; which may never happen.

OK. that sounds good.