what is masculinity? (LADIES ONLY)

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so i was talking to this girl, going on dates with her, etc. and i decided not to pursue her because she said that i wasnt masculine enough nor did i strike her as someone who has adult-like issues (money, houses, bills, loans, marriage etc). i guess i turned her off when she found out that i was a geek, but she overlooked the fact that i live and support myself with a full-time job.

so my question to you, ladies is what does masculinity mean to you? what is your definition?

Aaaannnnnnnndddddd...........GO!

Last edited by darktemplar05 on 09 Apr 2013, 4:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I can certainly say that a man who identifies himself with a video game character is probably not considered masculine by most women.

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its just an avatar of my favorite fictional character, doesnt mean anything. better to have him than a 5-star pentagram on my page, which tells me you identify yourself with the devil. Turd.

masculinity is not as important as decency. this girl was being superficial and perhaps dishonest.

I think the traditional gender role expectations are evolving
from male = power, dominance, physical strength, (all high testosterone traits)
female = submissive, decorative, gentle

I see masculinity in men who are comfortable in themselves and considerate of others,
independent in their lives but able to ask for help when needed instead of trying to "prove themselves".

I just realised that I see posturing "tough" men as those who are still struggling to be the Alpha male,
and men who are not aggressive or dominant have already achieved it!
Or something...

It's not a 5 pointed pentagram star. It has 6 points & is the Fruit of Life, derived from the Flower of Life, and also displays the 5 platonic solids - which are the 5 3-Dimensional geometric solid shapes that make up everything in the universe. Every possible line, shape, curve, arc, spiral, shape etc that's possible to create on any scale from the subatomic infinitesimally small to the largest scale of the entire universe is defined by the math derived from these ancient symbols.

I was actually talking about "Dark Templar"
Also, lol.. yea, it's totally about Satan.

I was actually talking about "Dark Templar"
Also, lol.. yea, it's totally about Satan.


i dont care what you meant dude, nor do i care about your avatar. im secure in my masculinity and its my prerogative if i want a video game character as my tag. you dont have to be a dick. dont comment on the forum if you cant be respectful of other people.

If you're secure in your masculinity, why did you make this thread?
I am being respectful, I have yet to imply you worship Satan or call you a Turd.. I only pointed out that, in general, women won't find you masculine if you're a video game fan.
Clearly I knew what a Dark Templar was, so I can't judge that much, right?
Relax.

Well I could be really crass and mention an anatomy part,but my thoughts are someone who is comfortable with his gender yet respects the other gender.
And here is the symbol.

Which honors both male and female equally.
And has nothing to do with the Judeo- Christian God or the idea of a Devil.

I like your description. Masculinity, and even femininity never represented set gender roles to me, or any set checklist. It's almost an underlying sense like a scent or flavor of someone, but it's very hard for me to describe it in words.

I've tended to date fairly non-alpha guys for the last... 20 odd years or so, who might fall under the category of "non-standard masculinity". They've all been great guys and they have all the same hangups and ego issues that their more alpha brothers have but with one key difference. If we get jumped, I'm on my own.

I'm currently dating a guy who actually got watchful and protective when a drunken fool came staggering and shouting into our midst and I cannot tell you how refreshing that is. But you know. It took 20 years to get to the point where I was tired of being the protector. So there's totally hope!

Are you really secure in your masculinity? Doesn't seem that way seeing as you made this thread and then jumped down the throat of the first person who posted in it by calling them a Satan worshipping turd.........

For the record, uwmonkdm is right. Most woman don't want awkward geeky guys. However, the right ones will so there is no point in hiding it.

Masculinity is commonly used in a wrong way to describe aspects, that are presented to us by media. According to advertisiments and media you as men has to be an unemotional idiot, ignoring your own logical feelings, so you can always be tough. Additional it is expected from you to return your brain into earlier times and to compete yourself with other male homo sapiens, to draw up a ranking system, showing your social worth in a group, which was pretty important in the time we were living in ape colonies. Because being able to compete with other males, showed that you could defend your group and your mate well, when other apes attacked, so it was an advantage to inherit your DNA. You also could simply beat another ape down, if he wanted to have sex with a female, and you didnt agree. You also could compete against your own group when wrestling with them for the better food parts and so on. Nowadays we invented a system that allows chimps to misuse money as replacement for physical appearance, social groups have agreed with each other that to battle in this new chimp ranking system, you are expected to show your moneyrank by buying useless stuff like a car that cant fly, but costs 10 times the price of a normal car or cloths in the same way and so on.

To acchieve so called "masculinity" you can decide if you want to match in the origin chimp ranking system, by working on your body to acchieve muscles. Or/and the new system, by earning money and buying nonsense stuff with it.


Or you try to find a girl that isnt into that stuff, but this will only be working if you yourself are able to loosen your mind in the opposite from the nowadays meaning of "femininity", because it will be rather hard to find a woman that sees old origin behavement important for herself, but not important for her partner. So normally, the more "femininer" a woman is in the way it is presented by media, the more she expect a man to do the same, when it comes to "masculinity".

There is much sarcasm, but in the core I mean it that way. ^^

Perhaps the lady in question didn't mean masculine as the opposite of "feminine", but as the opposite of "boyish". She didn't find his pursuits, such as video games, to be adult enough.

So you meant she was more interested in a teenager that simply wants to fit in the main group and does everything according to it. Instead of thinking like a grown up, if hobbies and deeds of him are hurting someone, and if there really is a need to let go of an interest and if its really necessary to denie his own harmless interest. I mean football is also nothing more then a game and watching it before television isnt healthier as playing computer games. ^^

I can only talk about the pople surrounding me, but the older they get, the more accept their own hobbies as something normal. By the way, 33 and reading Micky Mouse again. ;P