moderate/severe aspie vs mild aspie

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this is based on my life experience
as a moderate autism male, i've been around many moderate to serve autism folk.
both male and female,however none of the autism people I know has
ever dated an nt person. they usually date another autism or disable person,
or not at all.

and there are average to good looking moderate or severe autism women,
that I know but they are dating another disable man or not at all.

so,it's interesting to see autism people capable of dating nt people,
something I don't think Im capable of, same with all the autism
folks I know

and none of autism women I know would ever come close to dating an nt man,
and some of them are attractive.(I say this,because some guys will say''easy for autism
women to date nt men'' maybe for some mild aspie women it is,but for more moderate
to severe autism women it's is not)

so,there a difference between mild autism and moderate and severe autism
in dating

not only in dating...

I get where you're coming from, but you're basing your conclusion on too small a sample; people you know or have heard of.
To my knowledge there has never been a comprehensive sociological study of people on the spectrum and their ability to form relationships with NT people.
I am a self diagnosed Aspie - going for formal diagnosis on Friday, and I have dated a number of women, only one of which I suspect was on the spectrum, and only one of whom has a diagnosed disability, the rest would have been NTs.
I will grant that my relationships have been difficult, and that I divorced my first wife who was an NT, but this was about incompatibility, a series of stressful events that broke down the relationship, and a conflict between her need to feel in control and my need for a sense of stability.

So in summation; Aspies and Auties can and do date NTs, it's just that relationships are difficult, and for some the struggle is too much for them to feel it is worthwhile making the effort.
Also, as ASD seems to have a genetic component, dating across the spectrum must have been happening all along, otherwise either NTs and ASD would have either started to evolve into different non compatible species, or ASD would have been wiped out due to reaching a genetic dead end.
Similar to the now disproved theory that Neanderthals did not interact with or breed with modern humans; DNA research has proven that we all have a bit of "caveman" inside us.

That said, I would say very severe ASD cases would often not date, as they have difficulty with communication and interaction in general, and often lack the independence to "launch". You can't date if you can't communicate.

Relationships are difficult.
Period.
The End.
No additional qualifiers needed.

Pretty much.

I'm pretty sure a girl will date me because she thinks I'm hot and feels sorry for me and wants to "fix" me, and then either will stay with me out of pity for years and break up with me later, or break up with me after a week with no pity (probably preferably to the slow drawn out lies...)

It's rarely as black-and-white as low-functioning vs. high-functioning. Usually, people with AS are low-functioning on some aspects and high-functioning on others.

I know this statement will make me unpopular here, but many who self-diagnose themselves with AS do not really have it. I was diagnosed as a mild case (allthough I'm probably an average case of AS judging from this message board); I still struggle with language (verbal, that is), I still can't cope with changes in my routine, I'm crippled socially, I pretty much let my special interests control my life, I pace A LOT and can't sit still unless I'm interacting with something I'm very interested in--and I've suffered from both work and relationship instability in the past. After all, AS is more severe and less common than PDD-NOS.

there is a difference between mild aspie and moderate or severe autism folks
when comes to dating.

1-mild aspie(ma) have a higher chance of dating nt people
2-moderate or severe one's usually don't socialize as much.
so they wouldn't go to clubs,bars to pickup
dates
3-if moderate or severe one do go to clubs,bars
they would stand out, and not blend in
4-you can tell a women with moderate or severe autism.
they usually can't mask it.
5-moderate or severe autism can have alots of sex.
but usually with similiar autism or disable folks
but they usually have low number of sex partner.
if at all.


this is base on the moderate or severe autism folks I know.
and i've been around variety of them since school.

I agree with that. A lot of self-diagnosed cases are probably non-autistics trying to make an excuse for their various failings in life.

AS must be attractive to people that want to self-diagnose themselves with something since traits of it are being "smart", nice to others, etc.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-real-dise ... me-trendy/

I agree with that. A lot of self-diagnosed cases are probably non-autistics trying to make an excuse for their various failings in life.[\quote]

But isn't the problem when there aren't any failings?

No cause then they'd get off their azz, and go have the psychological-evaluation done which they should easily to be able to afford.

I think a lot of people only see the positive stuff in historical aspies and not all the bad stuff that the psychiatrists who diagnosed them post-mortem did indeed see. They see Einstein's theory of relativity and the way he altered science, not his tendency to daydream, his outbursts of anger, his rigid routines and his lack of friends growing up. This is the case for present day celebrities with the disorder as well; people see Heather Kuzmich and see a girl who's both pretty, artistic and intelligent, not a girl with significant social difficulties who works hard to cover the disorder up.

I'm not saying that it's overdiagnosed or anything (I'd say it's underdiagnosed in people with BDD, for instance), but boys who want to justify their World of Warcraft habits or girls who want to be like Heather Kuzmich shouldn't diagnose themselves with Asperger's.

Last edited by Kurgan on 10 Jul 2013, 3:12 pm, edited 3 times in total.

Asperger's syndrome is the new bisexual.

No, more like the new ADHD.
Bisexuality is usually mostly a fad in girls because they see movie stars doing it and getting all the guys hot from it. Nobody adopts Asperger's or ADHD to get dates or get laid.

These girls do it because it's cool and at the same time it's popular and alternative at the same time. Don't get me wrong, though, there are girls who are genuinely bisexual, but far from everyone who self-identifies as it are.

Wow, that's pretty sad. And I think that's more pathological than any neurological problem out there. LOL