a quick question about appropriate behaviour

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Kezzstar
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25 Jun 2013, 8:34 pm

I'm probably best off asking NTs this, but here we go.

Anyone who's seen my recent posts knows I am besoted with an Aussie Rules Football player from my favourite team. He's always very nice to me, always stops for a chat, kissed me on the cheek after he won his Club Champion award, called me his "lucky charm" and for some reason is still single. I'm also his player sponsor which means I pay about $600 extra on top of my Club Membership fee to sponsor him (it's really cool, you get a welcome letter from your player, a signed photo or guernsey, and a whole hour with your sponsored player for the year! Like I said though, he usually comes and spends more time with me after training sessions or if he sees me at other Club functions). I've also said that this year I'll be going to every Lions game this season, not just the home games, which means a lot of flying (and I usually run into the team on the plane).

Anyway, on Sunday we had a come-fron-behind, goal-after-the-siren win against a top-four club. My throat is still sore! After a home-team win, it is customary for the home team to grab a footy or two each, sign them and then hand them out to people who crowd around the boundary line (usually kids). He has said a few times that if the boys win, and he sees me on the boundary line or at the airport, he'd come and say hi and have a chat to me (usually after asking for the umpteenth time where I sit). Now I took this with a grain of salt, I mean, he's a high-paid footy player, why the hell would he want to talk to me after a game? But after the game on Sunday (and I have people who witnessed this), and remember this is a HUGE win for the Club, all the players are high as kites on the win, the crowd are going absolutely beserk, everyone is happy and rapt, he got his footy, made a beeline for me, and gave me the footy. He kept his word. I completely froze, I wanted to hug him so badly it wasn't funny.

So this weekend is a game in Tasmania where we're against another top-4 club. If we win again and we're on the same flight (highly likely) he will probably come over and say hi to me at the airport. Would it be appropriate for me to give him a hug and/or a kiss on the cheek in this circumstance? Apparently he has flirted with me before (and me being a tool, I haven't realised it until 3-4 days after the event). I really like him, he's someone I have looked up to for a long time and he's also really cute.

I really would like to be able to hug him!


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Last edited by Kezzstar on 26 Jun 2013, 12:18 am, edited 1 time in total.

JanuaryMan
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25 Jun 2013, 8:37 pm

You're a girl, and he's devoted a lot of his time to you, sponsored or not. I think the next time he does this it's not inappropriate to hug or kiss him :D just if it's heavy kissing...let him be the initatior.
Generally speaking I don't see the problem here.



nopenope
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25 Jun 2013, 8:44 pm

He's not out of your league.



Kezzstar
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25 Jun 2013, 8:49 pm

nopenope wrote:
He's not out of your league.


You sure? He's got a six-pack and I'm carrying between 7-10 extra kilos (ALMOST got to 60kgs once, but then I had surgery on my mouth and the antibiotics really stuffed me up). Plus I have no chest to speak of.


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JanuaryMan
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25 Jun 2013, 8:55 pm

Kezzstar wrote:
nopenope wrote:
He's not out of your league.


You sure? He's got a six-pack and I'm carrying between 7-10 extra kilos (ALMOST got to 60kgs once, but then I had surgery on my mouth and the antibiotics really stuffed me up). Plus I have no chest to speak of.
Not every footballer is after a trophy wife. Some of them are real people and want to connect to someone who is equally real. Besides, what's chest size got to do with anything :)



Kezzstar
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25 Jun 2013, 8:58 pm

JanuaryMan wrote:
Kezzstar wrote:
nopenope wrote:
He's not out of your league.


You sure? He's got a six-pack and I'm carrying between 7-10 extra kilos (ALMOST got to 60kgs once, but then I had surgery on my mouth and the antibiotics really stuffed me up). Plus I have no chest to speak of.
Not every footballer is after a trophy wife. Some of them are real people and want to connect to someone who is equally real. Besides, what's chest size got to do with anything :)


I guess you're right...I just don't feel like you're right, if that makes any sense.


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JanuaryMan
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25 Jun 2013, 9:00 pm

Kezzstar wrote:
JanuaryMan wrote:
Kezzstar wrote:
nopenope wrote:
He's not out of your league.


You sure? He's got a six-pack and I'm carrying between 7-10 extra kilos (ALMOST got to 60kgs once, but then I had surgery on my mouth and the antibiotics really stuffed me up). Plus I have no chest to speak of.
Not every footballer is after a trophy wife. Some of them are real people and want to connect to someone who is equally real. Besides, what's chest size got to do with anything :)


I guess you're right...I just don't feel like you're right, if that makes any sense.

A question if I may - why do you feel like this? Does he have other followers who attend the games often that you feel are more attractive than you, or have his attention more than you do?
I don't understand why you worry about how appropriate your behaviour is. Your behaviour seems to be very reasonable. Do you not feel worthy of being more affectionate towards him or something?
As far as fangirls go, you're being very moderate in your behaviour and have nothing to fear about inappropriateness.



Kezzstar
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25 Jun 2013, 9:08 pm

JanuaryMan wrote:
Kezzstar wrote:
JanuaryMan wrote:
Kezzstar wrote:
nopenope wrote:
He's not out of your league.


You sure? He's got a six-pack and I'm carrying between 7-10 extra kilos (ALMOST got to 60kgs once, but then I had surgery on my mouth and the antibiotics really stuffed me up). Plus I have no chest to speak of.
Not every footballer is after a trophy wife. Some of them are real people and want to connect to someone who is equally real. Besides, what's chest size got to do with anything :)


I guess you're right...I just don't feel like you're right, if that makes any sense.

A question if I may - why do you feel like this? Does he have other followers who attend the games often that you feel are more attractive than you, or have his attention more than you do?
I don't understand why you worry about how appropriate your behaviour is. Your behaviour seems to be very reasonable. Do you not feel worthy of being more affectionate towards him or something?
As far as fangirls go, you're being very moderate in your behaviour and have nothing to fear about inappropriateness.


Well, I am the founder and admin of his Fan Club, before he won the Club Champion last year though a lot of people wanted him traded or dropped, which really upset me as he's a really good player, just vastly underrated. He works really hard and does his job without waiting for kudos or anything, which is why I admire him so much. I try to be like that now at work, just go in there and do my job no matter what people say about me.

Surely though there are plenty of girls he knows in his private life who are probably a million times prettier than me.


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Gordon, "Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends: Whistles and Sneezes"
http://www.normalautistic.blogspot.com.au - please read and leave a comment!


JanuaryMan
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25 Jun 2013, 9:12 pm

It sounds to me like you have put him on a pedestal.
Just be as affectionate and and enthusiastic as you want around him and let it be.
If you feel your behaviour is ever too inappropriate or his enthusiasm does not reciprocate yours then perhaps consider someone to help you with your club duties then.

In the mean time I think you've put too much idol worship ahead of your own feelings. You're only human. So be human and worry about the rest later.



Kezzstar
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25 Jun 2013, 11:20 pm

JanuaryMan wrote:
It sounds to me like you have put him on a pedestal.
Just be as affectionate and and enthusiastic as you want around him and let it be.
If you feel your behaviour is ever too inappropriate or his enthusiasm does not reciprocate yours then perhaps consider someone to help you with your club duties then.

In the mean time I think you've put too much idol worship ahead of your own feelings. You're only human. So be human and worry about the rest later.


It's not hard to put this guy up on a pedestal, he's that good (even if he didn't play Sonic as a kid and played Mario instead...I can always re-educate him hee hee).

I'll try being my usual affectionate self and see how it goes. Thanks :)


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BookPerson
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26 Jun 2013, 12:04 am

From what you say, but he sounds like a nice guy, who is genuinely and sincerely interested in you. I think hugging is definitely fine, so is a peck on the cheek. But the important thing is about what you're comfortable with.



yellowtamarin
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26 Jun 2013, 12:12 am

This is a public forum, if I were you I'd get rid of the link to the photo and change the name, unless you don't mind him reading all this.



Kezzstar
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26 Jun 2013, 12:17 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
This is a public forum, if I were you I'd get rid of the link to the photo and change the name, unless you don't mind him reading all this.
I doubt a famous footy player would bother coming on here. He rarely uses computers as it is (too busy watching chick flicks and training). Plus his photo is all over the internet anyway, just look on the Lions website and any Australian news site.

Still, I'll remove it anyway.


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Gordon, "Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends: Whistles and Sneezes"
http://www.normalautistic.blogspot.com.au - please read and leave a comment!


kingfishereyes
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26 Jun 2013, 5:06 am

I hug people I don't even know as way of saying hello XD and i'm NT so I wouldn't worry XD