Post-Breakup Vehicular Vandalism

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I'm sure we've all heard in the media: (1) A guy breaks up with a girl or does something to make her break up with him, and then (2) She completely trashes his car. It's been repeated time and time again in almost every TV show I've seen. The "TV shows" even included the news, not just sitcoms. Oftentimes, the said girl is egged on by her friends to trash her ex-boyfriend's car, something like: "Giiiirl, that man's a dog! You gotta go trash that car of his!! !"

Now, before anyone slams me for being sexist or that "it's just a stupid TV show," let me point something out. I most strongly believe that art imitates life. In other words, those media stereotypes about the guy's car getting trashed had to have come from somewhere; they have to have happened enough times in real life for the TV producers to pick up that idea for themselves.

The possibility of post-breakup vehicular vandalism has contributed greatly to my fear of long-term relationships. Every relationships I had, which I found online, I searched by her location strategically. That is, I dated girls that lived far from my home, to make it more of a hassle for them to come trash my car in case a break-up happens. (If she didn't have a car at all, even easier; getting to me will be a real hassle, and going on a city bus with a baseball bat and/or a hammer will draw negative attention for sure.) Sure, it was a hassle to see each other, but at least I didn't have to fear for my car.

There are two allaying factors that worked in my favor so far. (1) She always broke up with me first, each time for a reason that wasn't my fault. (2) The parking lot in my apartment complex has at least 100 windows facing it; anyone coming to trash my car will be noticed for sure.

Still, back to my original question: just how common is it for a girl to trash a guy's car if he breaks up with her or does something to make her break up with him? Please answer honestly and seriously. This is a real fear for me. Thanks for understanding.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaSy8yy-mr8[/youtube]

Last edited by Tyri0n on 21 Jul 2013, 1:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Lol, I have got this "issue" solved in a really easy nerdy way in my case.

I don't own a car, neither a driving license.

The women on TV pretty much all have serious acting-out Borderline Personality Disorder. If they weren't hot, nobody would ever put up with them.

To answer your question, no I don't think it's that common. This post is hilarious though.

I muted the sound, played the video, saw her annoying face and instantly stopped the video.

Case closed for me.

Just because it is depicted in the media doesn't mean it is common. (Murder is the basis for the plots of a myriad of shows but it's actually an uncommon way to die, for example.) Those instances where a woman has gotten revenge via vandalism tend to be in cases of infidelity, so if you don't intend to cheat on your significant other then you won't have to worry about it.

So you avoid relationships because you're worried that if it doesn't work out, she's going to key your car? You can't let worry (especially for something unlikely such as this, which would be a criminal offense btw) hold you back.

I have a lot more to lose from my car being vandalized than from a break-up. If a relationships ends, I'll lose the sex and the companionship, but I'll still be able to carry on with my daily life pretty much like before. My friends will still be there, to buy me a consolation beer and give me a pep talk. My job will still be there, and it'll continue giving me income. My family will still be there, and... they'll still be there. My sources of entertainment will still be there, to take my mind off the break-up. My car will still be there, to let me get to my friends, family, job, and entertainment. Basically, I'll be knocked down a few notches, but I won't be defeated. And in a week to a month, I'll be good as new.

But if my car get vandalized, it'll be paralyzed in terms of getting to places. Public transpiration stinks where I live, and there are absolutely no buses going to my workplace. It'll take weeks for my car to get fixed. Or worse, if my insurance company classifies it as totaled, I'll have to go through the hassle of buying a new one. That and the hassle of pressing charges, and that goes along with having to prove that it was indeed my ex-girlfriend who vandalized the car. Plus the fortune I'll have to spend of lawyers for the whole proceeding.

I realize that by posting this, I just confirmed the stereotype that aspies lack empathy. But that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

I'm 45 years old - I've gone through break-ups, and I've known countless other people go through break-ups, but I have never even contemplated vandalising an ex's car and I have never heard of anyone else doing it either.

This thread should be stickied as an L&D classic.

Are you really that worried about your car getting trashed, OP? Not only would it be unusual for a girl to vandalize your car, but I'd think it would be very unusual for her to do anything beyond slash a tire or key it up a little. Nothing to actually leave you without transportation for long.

Actually, the one and only time I ever vandalized an ex's car, which was a long time ago, I'm sure it cleaned up easily. And, it showed him why he shouldn't be a hurtful prick who leaves his sunroof open ... a valuable lesson for anyone.

Absolutely!

I tried to write a coherent answer but... I just couldn't stop laughing, it's definitely the funniest thing I've ever read here

Dude, find a real problem to worry about.

If you're going to worry about a girl demolishing your car, you might as well worry about her cutting off your penis while your sleeping or taking a crap on your bed..........

I have trouble believing this is a genuine fear of yours.

But if it keeps you up at night, surely there's some kind of insurance you can buy for the car, that would pay out if someone trashed it?

Yes. What the OP needs to avoid is borderlines (so named because they live on the borderline between fantasy and reality). A reliable way to do that is find someone with good coping and conflict resolution skills, because borderlines are incapable.

And they often do a lot more damage than merely destroy cars. ID regularly shows the stories of real-life borderlines, who wreck everything they can. Houses, finances, careers, reputations. And when there is nothing left to wreck, some proceed to kill their pets, children, or ex-spouses - or if God is feeling fair that day, themselves. My Aspie BF's ex-wife is one of these end-stage borderlines, and I am frankly terrified of what she might do. Murder is the only thing she hasn't done. Yet.

I don't think the OP is being paranoid. I think he is simply too narrowly focused on one specific concern. Most women don't vandalize or do any harm after a break-up, because most women aren't borderlines.