What's worse actually for a guy who is a 40 yo virgin?

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Being a 40 year old virgin because you were afraid of approaching women and therefore didn't ever try it? (ignorance = bliss?)

Or

Being a 40 year old virgin because every woman you've approached in your lifetime (regardless of what they looked like and where they were from) rejected you fiercefully (...and let's say in this case it's more than 50 women obviously...) to the point it even gave you a giant global "fame" for being the way you are now?


A lot of people say no reputation is worse than a bad reputation, but I'm not sure of it in this context though.


What do you think?

I can't offer any advice on relating to women as I don't know any of the specifics here. I will say though, if you don't want to be considered a virgin any longer, Vegas is a good place to jet off to for a weekend to pay somebody to relieve you of that title. I am pretty sure they still have legal brothels over there.

It's not an ideal answer to your problem, but I bet it would help with your self confidence in the long run.

Lol, the thread example is not about me myself.

I'm 26 (but still virgin though).

If you are on the east coast, particularly in the southeast, you could fly to the Caribbean. I lost my virginity years ago, at age eighteen, in a house of ill repute in Puerto Rico. All it takes is money.

Is this a hypothetical question, and you are not the 40 year old?

If so, both get a 0-0 draw in the Relative Scheme of Things Premier League.

Virgin due to stupidity,
Or Virgin due to failure?

If we do the lobotomy (as you tactfully suggested) NOW you won't even remember you asked this question in the first place. Therefore, question solved.

The 2nd option would suck more.

At least with the first option you don't know if you could have been a prospect to women because you were unwilling to take the risks.. With the 2nd option you'd be continually getting rejected and know that there's a reason that nobody wants you which would have to kill your self esteem and confidence.

Option 1 is far worse than option 2.

If you were to fall into option 1, you have lived your life, your youth, in fear. No one is afraid who has experienced option 2.

Being rejected is not the end, it is the beginning. Quitting without trying due to fear for yourself is cowardice. A coward will never succeed at anything in life because he has no self discipline and therefore no self respect.

If someone were to fall into category 2, he is a mighty, mighty bastion of courage. That in itself is attractive and sexy. To have the discipline to face another almost certain public failure and humiliation again and again will return a HUGE amount of self respect. Yeah you failed, but you tried and you had the stones to try again despite the failure.

Hookers are fantasy and don't count.

worse is to never approach. From approaching You would learn from your failure and become a better person. Also you're exposing yourself to a high pressure situation which gives you a thicker skin. Thirdly you could evaluate why your failing and what areas of your life you need to work on and why you're not having success with the women.

I went clubbing with a NT dude and we didn't have success. Then he found a girl and is currently dating.

Yep I would. Its good practice for social skills. Then when a relationship comes along you've practiced for it.

Actually, I'm not sure option two really even exists. There is always a willing woman out there. The real question is how low an aspie is willing to set his standards.

It's better to try and fail than never try at all and wonder what if you did.