Biggest relationship challenge?

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Anticipating and responding to other people's emotions is the hardest thing. Needing alone time on my own terms is another one, but the former is I think bigger.

I get the impression that NTs can foresee when issues might arise and then act a certain way to prevent them. I can't....For me it is usually a case of having someone get upset, and then me hopelessly trying to do damage control afterwards. Only I can't do the damage control properly because A, I have no clue what I should have done, and B, the person who is upset refusing to say in a logical way what they needed and or need from that point forward. This happened in two of my failed relationships. I even specifically asked what should I not have said and or said, and they refused to tell me outright. It was as if I was being punished for not knowing, and punished again by deliberately being kept in the dark when asking out of mere curiosity and the desire to improve.

Then there is the perseveration on my part, with there being no answer to the questions A, what did I do? and B, what must I avoid doing in the future? Also, C, what do I need to learn how to do?

So frigging confusing.

That's a general communication problem.

If the person in question is refusing to tell you what you did when you ask what you did wrong, then either your romantic partner needs to step up. Or...or you've missed something about that person that deeply wounds them.

For the sake of easiness, I'll use an easy example. Let's say your partner has gone on and on about hating dogs. And then one day you say, in all earnestness, expecting her to agree with you wholeheartedly 'Let's get a dog!'
The problem here is not that you want a dog, but that you apparently didn't know your partner enough to expect something so ridiculous as to actually think they want a dog. Having them tell you, once again, that they don't want a dog would be infuriating for your partner.

There's probably some thought on your partner's side that 'Hey, this guy knows me and likes me for who I am'. But then you go and do something that shows the opposite of that. The very act of not knowing is the problem. They won't help if what you did was so...romance-breaking as to make them question the entire relationship.

It's probably best to think of it as a burst bubble on their part, like they suddenly got to see you for who you are, someone who doesn't read people very well, and that yes, that includes the object of your affection. Because it means that they weren't a right fit for you, they couldn't deal with you the way you are, as opposed to you not being good enough for them.

But I'm privy to less information about your relationships than you are. Maybe they simply were too stuck up to tell you what it was. I dunno.

That actually makes sense. The woman sees my mind or cognition in a way that makes her think that it will cause future problems.

Man, if only she had said that, I'd have been cool with it!!

"I've just seen a side of you that makes me doubt that we can work as a couple. You have failed to perceive my feelings with adequate precision or reliability. I need to leave this relationship." Now THAT would be an answer I can actually take!

You obviously need to find someone who is open and honest, either that or someone who will settle and bottle their emotions up such that you don't know what's wrong and have them wear a smile while doing it.
I'd strongly opt for the first one. :-p

Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of a new relationship. Its continuing mission: to explore strange new brains, to seek out love and mutual understanding. To boldly go where we're unsure we could go, before.....

When we date NTs, it requires that they learn to use our words and we memorize person-specific clues and behaviors. It's a giant PITA, but it appears to be the only way that's happening. :-/

My biggest relationship issue is entering into one. As long as I don't make a fool of myself, I can maintain them.