Rape mode

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When I was 19-22 after having moved to a big city I experienced on several instances that my body and mind went into a sudden onset "rape modus" when seeing a girl alone by herself (most where walking\running alone in the forest).

Instantaneous analysis of risks and possible ways to attack, release of a massive chemical cocktail with lots of adrenaline. I never acted on this because something in the back of my head found risk too high in all instances and also my distance to the girls gave time for me to getting my s**t together from doing something horrible.

At that time I had still not had sex with anyone, seeing that this is a more common problem among boys and men here I wondered if anyone else have had similar experiences.

After having had sex I have not experienced anything like this anymore.

Dude, you should see a shrink about the that.

It`s many years ago.

The idea of having sex with a consenting woman who was keen for me to have my wicked way with her has always been a strong turn on, I think it is a normal healthy turn on for a man.

However the idea of sex with a distressed or resisting woman is alien to me (it is a turn off), I sincerely hope that the majority of men view the latter of the two hypothetical women not to be a sexual turn on. I think that those who get excited at the idea of commiting rape need either locking up for the good of the public and/or some heavy duty professional help !

Umm, no. People should get locked up for things they do, not things they've thought about doing. If someone isn't actually harming anyone there is no need for therapy either. Also women can have rape fantasies too.

This is the first time I've heard of someone actually wanting to rape someone in real-life circumstances though, although most people wouldn't confess to something like that even if they've thought it.

Has anyone else answered yes in the poll? (I'm female, I can't see the results)

To clarify I had not fantasized or in general had any conscious thoughts about rape, this was something happening there and then suddenly and the focused thinking process was maybe 10-40 seconds, but I could feel the effect on my whole body much longer. I was frightened myself afterwards.


2 yes (1 me)
8 no

An indian girl once skyped me telling me she has rape fantasies and she acts on them, like going to dangerous places at night hoping to get raped.

Crazy stuff, I wasn't believing what i was hearing. .

As for the OP case, I don't think it was normal, I am technically virgin (never had vaginal sex) and never fantasized about rape, the very idea turns me off.

Studies show that rapists get sexual arousal to rape presentations, while nonrapist men don't, this is one of those studies: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/3214828; other studies show similar results. It is possible that the rapist-mind is basically some type of developed personality disorder or...some ugly trait inherited from some of our ape ancestors into some men today.

The OP has those rapist tendencies, and should seek for help.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 01 Feb 2014, 3:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Rape fantasies are actually very common amoungst men. I remember one study showed that 1/3 of men had rape fantasies, all of whom had a history of being verbally abused by female peers. The hypothesis is that verbal abuse by female peers reduces an individual's subconsciously percieved romantic value, thus leaving the only chance of reproduction at coersive copulations.

I'm guessing that the frequency of rape fantasies is far greater in the aspie community due to the near-universal bullying and abuse we experience at the hand of both sexes. Of course, many males won't admit it. I certainly expereience coersive sex fantasies, but I know that such behaviors are immoral. In fact, the fantasies themselves are immoral, I merely commit sin in my heart.

I've never seriously contemplated rape, never going as far as to "calculate" or experience an "adrenaline rush" though. It's one problem for you to have coersive sex fantasies, but it's a big problem if you seriously contemplate acting out on them. If the latter is true, I would recommend seeing professional help.

That isn't normal.

I'm surprised you are mentioning it anywhere online and to anyone other than a psychologist.

The_Face_of_Boo
I have seen rape roleplay porn and it did not do anything special for me.

I am not asking about people having fantasies or they turn ons.

I ask if people have found themselves automatically calculating (thanks for the word crubs) rape.

If she wants it that isn't rape though...although yes, I'd call that a rape fantasy. The men in the fantasy want to rape her.

I was talking about women wanting to rape other women or other men. This exists.

Thoughts aren't actions. I've have thought many awful things and I spoke to my psychiatrist about it. She said these thoughts were a result of anxiety and not to be concerned about it. Apparently it's a normal reaction to stress.

I'm glad you can admit this. I'm also glad you seem to know the difference between right and wrong, and that you haven't had these thoughts since you've had sex.

I'm a female. I've had those thoughts, but not the risk analysis. I have thoughts of watching people be raped that are disturbing, and they sometimes trigger crying and/or compulsions.

My husband has had something similar to you. He also doesn't do the risk analysis thing, though. He was most likely molested as a child, and had obsessive thoughts about him molesting a child. Pretty much the thoughts disgust him, but he was afraid he would be a pedophile. He was so terrified, at one point, I thought he might be developing OCD. It's common for people with OCD to have horrible obsessive thoughts that their brain torments them with, even though they would NEVER act upon them.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it doesn't seem like the fact you were thinking about rape excited you. You seem concerned with those previous thoughts and feelings. Since they don't happen anymore, is there a reason for bringing it up? Are you concerned it could happen again in the future?

I can't imagine how anyone could enjoy sex with another person who did not desire them in return. I wouldn't even want sex with a prostitute unless she could at least pretend she was happy to see me.

I used to have a 'friend' (one of those people who chose to befriend me, rather against my personal preferences), who once confessed to elaborate rape and abduction fantasies and I have no doubt if he'd thought he could have gotten away with it, he'd have done it in a minute. Perhaps not so surprisingly, this person was also rather larcenous, especially when drinking hard liquor - you couldn't go to the restroom without worrying that he'd steal something while you were gone - and was quite enamored of television and movie gangsters, I remember him being a rabid fan of Miami Vice back in the 80s and it was only years later I realized he loved the show not because he liked watching the cops - he wanted to be one of the villains. Eventually he became an addict, got caught up in the meth trade and went to prison. I guess he knows a little something about rape now.

I also once worked with a kid who had part time jobs taking photographs for the local police department and working the late shift at a mortuary, who got carried away in conversation and made some very disturbing comments about the lovely cadaver of a girl he went to school with who'd recently died in a car accident. He never actually confessed to abusing a corpse, but he had clearly given the idea a lot of thought. Sweet kid. Demented, but sweet.

I really hope you are seeking professional help.

I forgot to ask the OP: Have you had circumstances since you've had sex where a woman told you she does not want to have sex, and you respected that? If so, I would think you're in pretty good shape. However, if you're worried about what would happen if someone was drinking and said no/did not respond/was easy manipulated, and you don't know if you could control yourself, I would recommend seeking help.