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leafplant
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02 Mar 2014, 8:29 am

I am curious, what are people's opinions on the issue of attractiveness and open sexuality.

For example, if you came across this lady, would you think she is openly inviting sexual advances by the way she looks?

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ChrisP
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02 Mar 2014, 8:47 am

Mmm, nice car!



Marcia
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02 Mar 2014, 9:01 am

I would think that she is a model being paid to do a particular job, and that someone has decided what she should wear, how she should pose etc.

If she wasn't a model doing a job, then I'd probably think she was in some way deranged. Or having a laugh.



CockneyRebel
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02 Mar 2014, 9:07 am

This picture brings me back to a previous life.


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BirdInFlight
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02 Mar 2014, 9:18 am

Well, that picture is obviously a model being paid to pose that way in a staged setting. But if the wider question you're asking is about real life girls and women who dress in a sexy manner, that's more complicated.

As a woman myself, I can tell you that not every woman who does the makeup, hair and sexy clothing thing when going out, is actually "asking for it" at all. I think a lot of men can't believe that, because they see a woman dressing and even acting "sexy" and think in simplistic terms of "she's anybody's" or is "looking for it."

The thing is, while some girls may indeed be doing exactly that, what guys don't know about women is that we are also capable of dressing like that for reason not even remotely connected with a deliberate wish to get laid!

Other reasons for dressing up/dressing sexy or "attractive" are:

--- To "feel" pretty in and of herself, to feel that she does "clean up nice" and can present something that is society's latest idea of what's attractive. Not all women even care about that, but it can be a motivator especially when a girl is young and just starting to think about whether or not she is "attractive" or can dress up to be thought so.

--- For other women, ie., to compete, impress, etc. Personally I've never had this motivation as I can't really relate to that instinct, but I hear that some women do say "I do my makeup every morning not to impress men but to show other women I'm attractive."

--- Because some girls and women think these modes of presentation are just "the fashion" and what you do, and believe it or not they actually don't intend provocation of men. That's sounds incredibly naive but some women really aren't that aware of how men perceive sexy clothing choices.

-- To get men to notice them, yes, sure enough, but sometimes the girl isn't even thinking "I want to get laid," she's just thinking she wants simply to be noticed or talked to as a kind of confirmation that she's attractive. Again, a little naive but it is the way some girls might be thinking.

Like I say, from what I gather most men and boys simply believe that when a woman has chosen to "dress sexy" it can only be because she wants men to notice or actually do something about it....

And again, while there certainly are women for whom this is precisely the correct interpretation (not that there's anything wrong with that) -- you must bear in mind that there are some very innocent and naive motivations too. Hard to believe but in some cases it really isn't all about men, but about the girl thinking SHE likes the way she looks.

Personally I dress for comfort, and when I go out somewhere nice I dress more for "prettiness" rather than all-out sexyness.

But when I was young, on the occasions when I "dressed sexy", believe it or not I was thinking about liking the way I looked, and it went right over my head that men were getting a message from it. Call me naive but that was my thinking.

.

.



leafplant
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02 Mar 2014, 9:24 am

I know it's a photo shoot, duh.

How about this one, is he asking for it?

Image



Mindslave
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02 Mar 2014, 9:54 am

She isn't inviting sexual advances. If she was, then she would have the classic "come hither" look that everyone knows.

This woman is, however, posing in a manner to attract romantic attention. That is not the same as sex or lust. Al in all, its just a photo shoot. It's not real, which is where confusion might set in, as this is the age of advertising and professional lying.



BirdInFlight
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02 Mar 2014, 10:24 am

leafplant wrote:
I know it's a photo shoot, duh.

How about this one, is he asking for it?


Okay, so it's clear you're just effing around.

I'm sorry I took the time and trouble to give you a sincere answer about an interesting social phenomenon that does in fact deserve earnest discussion and perhaps people getting a chance to learn something REAL about the opposite sex.

I'm sorry I bothered.

.



leafplant
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02 Mar 2014, 10:39 am

BirdInFlight wrote:
leafplant wrote:
I know it's a photo shoot, duh.

How about this one, is he asking for it?


Okay, so it's clear you're just effing around.

I'm sorry I took the time and trouble to give you a sincere answer about an interesting social phenomenon that does in fact deserve earnest discussion and perhaps people getting a chance to learn something REAL about the opposite sex.

I'm sorry I bothered.

.


I am not at all effing around and i am sorry if you were expecting me to respond to your post. I said I was interested in hearing what people's opinions are, and I am sorry if that led you to believe I was going to engage in discussion with everyone who posted something. I wasn't planning on doing that.

I am just really curious what people's ideas are in general about society and how people dress and what assumed expectations exist. And I thank you for your contribution - I had no disagreement with it and no follow up questions.

I am however disappointed in your reaction just now. You need to check your own assumptions about what sort of attention you feel is due to you.



onewithstrange
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02 Mar 2014, 11:09 am

I get that women dress up to feel more attractive, but it seems disingenuous to expect men to also not approach. Did you mean 'inviting' as in she wanted sexual advances, or did you mean it in a passive sense?


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Cafeaulait
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02 Mar 2014, 11:16 am

Yes, they are asking for it.



Eureka13
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02 Mar 2014, 11:40 am

Re: both photos. If I saw either one of them out in public alone (i.e., without an obviously romantic companion), I would assume they were advertising it for sale.



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02 Mar 2014, 2:36 pm

leafplant wrote:
I know it's a photo shoot, duh.

How about this one, is he asking for it?

Image


Looks like somebody never skipped leg day.



cathylynn
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02 Mar 2014, 2:41 pm

nobody ever can be assumed to be asking for it.



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02 Mar 2014, 2:46 pm

If I came across this lady she would already have been getting it.


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cathylynn
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02 Mar 2014, 3:13 pm

goldfish21 wrote:
If I came across this lady she would already have been getting it.


this is rape culture on display for the whole world.