Learning some PUA skills is never helpful

Post Reply New Topic

...unless, of course, you want to look like a jerk who uses and despises women.

It's especially unfortunate trying to use them on smart women, who can read and use the internet and all.

I thought smart women were immune to all that rot.

I share pick-up lines as jokes sometimes, but not too often. I've never used one on a woman, because I'm terrified of rejection and I don't want her to feel manipulated. The way I see it, people who truly love you will accept you in spite of yourself...but its not wise to test their patience by acting like a jackass.

be who you are and say what you feel, because the people who matter don't mind, and the people who mind don't matter.

Knowing a lot about pick up is great if you're looking for casual sex, but obviously it's a terrible way to present yourself to a woman you're interested in having a romantic relationship with.

Some knowledge of the subject, like ways to get their attention by emotionally "dragging them in", is helpful though. As long as you don't change your personality to a large degree, using pick up tactics to get their attention and then segue into being yourself should be useful. I'm not talking about cheesy pickup lines or jokes, something more like approaching a woman confidently and giving her the impression you're a fun person to be around.

some people are utterly lacking the "fun to be around" genes so for such [unless they have marked acting skill] PUA is a waste of money.

Yep. If I hadn't already been emailing with ex-AS-bf for months, I probably wouldn't have gone on talking to him after our first skype, because his opening lines were cree-py. Very PUA. I can still hear them. I don't hang around with that kind of guy, so it sounded especially weird. Fortunately he dropped that business and just started talking like himself after a few minutes. But it was pretty clear he didn't notice at all how uncomfortable the lines were making me.

So all this picking up heavy weights in the gym are in vain?? :O

I actually have to disagree with the OP. PUA tactics in of themselves can be very useful. They are skills for interacting with people in a specific way - like a salesman tactic for closing a deal etc.

What is wrong and objectionable is to use those tactics without feeling or consideration for the well being of the person you are applying them to. To treat people like objects, without care or concern, in other words. As long as those using PUA strategies make sure to be kind and considerate of the other person's well being and best interests, then I don't see any problem with using communication skills that get you closer to that other person.

But if by using PUA tactics you mean adopt a women despising attitude, then obviously, I will not be able to agree with that.

ha! lol, I have never approached a woman. I've only had one female to female relationship and I was the one being seduced. Mostly my bi side is expressed in my private fantasies. I find people in general too much hassle to try to have an actual relationship with them, either male or female.

But I think I use PUA in every day life just to get by socially, if that makes sense. Like, complimenting people to ingratiate myself, smiling a lot, bringing people chocolates if they've done something nice to me etc. IDK if that makes me heartless but I just want to get on with my life with minimum bother and that seems to do the trick.

Okay guys, so you object to PUA methods. Fine. Now,you have just picked up something from Brookstone for your mom from the mall. As you walk out of the store, you see, sitting at a bench a woman. Something about the woman makes you screams insid,t "I HAVE TO MEET HER!" So, how do you intend to go about it? How would you recommend others in the same situation?

Okay guys, so you object to PUA methods. Fine. Now,you have just picked up something from Brookstone for your mom from the mall. As you walk out of the store, you see, sitting at a bench a woman. Something about the woman makes you screams insid,t "I HAVE TO MEET HER!" So, how do you intend to go about it? How would you recommend others in the same situation?