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Accepting the "no"

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ToShinTim
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14 Apr 2014, 7:26 am

I've always been taught in life that we, as a whole, should not take "no" for an answer. What does that mean when put in the context of other's decisions - especially with regard to relationships? Does the "proverb" still hold true?



Marky9
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14 Apr 2014, 7:29 am

In my experience it applies in business relationships, but not personal ones.



AmandaMarie
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14 Apr 2014, 7:56 am

Yeah, don't take no for an answer does not apply to relationships.



jrjones9933
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14 Apr 2014, 8:21 am

It means when you work in sales, you need to look at customer objections as an opportunity to show them how your product meets their needs.

In personal relationships, another well-known saying takes absolute precedence:

No means no.



Cafeaulait
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14 Apr 2014, 8:51 am

Marky9 wrote:
In my experience it applies in business relationships, but not personal ones.



LookingLost
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14 Apr 2014, 9:17 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
In personal relationships, another well-known saying takes absolute precedence:
No means no.


^ I'd agree with that. Not 'taking 'no' for an answer' might lead to violating someone else's rights, and possibly being reported for sexual harassment or similar. If someone indicates that they are not interested, I'm pretty sure it would be best to respect that.


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FireyInspiration
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14 Apr 2014, 9:18 am

Marky9 wrote:
In my experience it applies in business relationships, but not personal ones.


*DING DING DING*

We have a winner



Aristophanes
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14 Apr 2014, 9:28 am

Unless it's opposite's day, I don't know how many times I have to explain the concept of opposite's day to the police and court system, but it gets tiring.



TornadoEvil
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14 Apr 2014, 10:42 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
It means when you work in sales, you need to look at customer objections as an opportunity to show them how your product meets their needs.

In personal relationships, another well-known saying takes absolute precedence:

No means no.


Even when if is much much more implied than said. Which is extremely difficult to think about, but all you can do is move on or sit there waiting for something that might never come,



Toy_Soldier
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14 Apr 2014, 10:44 am

In relationships, not taking no for an answer ranges from being overbearing to a rapist.



leafplant
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14 Apr 2014, 12:36 pm

I also have problem with not taking no for an answer in a business context or any other context.

When you refuse to take no for an answer you are in fact bulling the other person, disrespecting their boundaries and behaving as if your needs are more important than theirs.

When I get a call from a sales person that has been taught this method and that continues to bully me heartlessly in spite of my valiant attempts to get off the call as politely as possible, I have no recourse than to either put the phone down or take it further - send complaints to their company/manager or shout abuse at them or take as much information as possible about who they are, track them down and show them exactly how it feels when someone won't take no for an answer.

Whoever came up with that stupid idea 'don't take no for an answer' forgot to add but be prepared for the consequences



AspieOtaku
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14 Apr 2014, 12:55 pm

I say no quite alot and if no doesn't work piss off does, of course they might walk away with a scowl on their face but it serves them right if they wont take no for an answer.


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14 Apr 2014, 2:27 pm

leafplant wrote:
I also have problem with not taking no for an answer in a business context or any other context.

When you refuse to take no for an answer you are in fact bulling the other person, disrespecting their boundaries and behaving as if your needs are more important than theirs.

When I get a call from a sales person that has been taught this method and that continues to bully me heartlessly in spite of my valiant attempts to get off the call as politely as possible, I have no recourse than to either put the phone down or take it further - send complaints to their company/manager or shout abuse at them or take as much information as possible about who they are, track them down and show them exactly how it feels when someone won't take no for an answer.

Whoever came up with that stupid idea 'don't take no for an answer' forgot to add but be prepared for the consequences


This. Totally.

I think "don't take no for an answer" can be good advice if interpreted right: don't give up just because you fail initially, but look for another path to success. The more naive and, sadly, more common interpretation seems to be: if someone tells you "no" just ask again - or just proceed as if they said "yes".


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Willard
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14 Apr 2014, 3:13 pm

I've never heard "Don't Take No For An Answer" as an adage or a piece of advice. I've always heard the phrase used as: "So-and-So wouldn't take no for an answer," which was intended to be a very negative description of someone too stupid, too selfish or too stubborn to compromise or to go away when they aren't welcome. It's never been a positive thing.



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14 Apr 2014, 8:24 pm

You can't possibly be serious.

Most people are taught from a very young age that it's not the case in relationships/dating/sex.

Whoever said "don't take no for an answer" in general is giving poor advice. In some situations sure, but in most, you probably should give people the option to make their own decision or you'll end up in prison.