So I plan to go out.

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So I plan on going to the Depot tonight (A bar and restaurant on the train tracks) I quit going to karaoke a while back. I use to love it, but the old DJ quit and the good old rock and roll and decent older people went with him. The new guy plays hip-hop, (which is a bit of a meltdown trigger) and has attracted a young, raucous, and quite honestly trashy crowd. Young people who want to get absolutely sloshed and act ignorant, who think that dancing means thrusting you a** rhythmic against a stranger's pelvis. disgusting. I haven't been since fall.

But I know they have live music on Saturday night, though I've never been because I use to work Saturday. I am hoping that the presence of live music will mean a more sophisticated crowd. Perhaps even some one worth talking to. I have no idea who is playing, but I know it is usually blues, rock, or something in between. No hip-hop.

But what do I do if I do see some one worth talking to? once, I guess a year ago winter, I saw a guy who caught my eye. He was wearing a panda hat, how threatening is that? I found it amusing so I worked up the courage to ask him if he'd lost a bet. And he got, I guess the term is cock-blocked, by his buddy. The guy jumped in from out of nowhere and was so loud and in my face all I could do was run for it.

Is there any way of stopping that from happening again? Maybe If some one cock blocks the next guy I talk to I should knee him in the junk. (kidding, kind of. Tempting though.) Aspie girls, how do you deal in this situation? How do you work up the nerve to talk to some one and what do you do when some loud, uncouth , neanderthal presents himself as an obstacle between you and an attempt to socialize? I am sick to death of sitting home alone with just the cat for company and some board games I've never even had an opportunity to open.

You mean you're tempted to knee-block the cock-block?
Sounds like an effective and appropriate counter-tactic, in my opinion. =)

My friend's fiance' got tried of one of those kinda guys recently, and punched him in the dick.
The consensus of the onlookers was that she should have punched him twice. And sooner.

I've no advice on what to do in a loud place that you're likely to see a specific person there only once.
It's not like, say, church where they may come every week and there's a few different times to grow something into a date.

To me, it seems like bars are places that you gotta grab a one-night-stand real quick and pray to god that eventually one of them might turn into some semblance of a reasonably okay longer term relationship.

Well that was a flop. Here I am at home drinking a rum and coke by myself.

Not having been there, it's hard to say what the friend's intentions were. Maybe he was trying to "pick up" a girl his friend attracted.

You can always invite one single person to dance or see another part of the event if their friends are interfering. Sorry tonight didn't turn out well, though.

You tell him: "Sorry but I am talking with him".

Well I usually sit at the bar order a beer, and just kind of quietly sit there and observe....I still have a very hard time initiating any interaction no matter how much I want to...but much of the time people eventually approach me. I've had guys buy me drinks and what not and talked to people...also I go to one specific bar hoping to run into some of the same people. I haven't really had anyone butt into an interaction I am having so not sure what I would do with that situation. Live music is always a good thing provided its decent music...I wouldn't care much for the hip hop either. Also having a couple beers does make me come off a bit more social and causes social interaction to seem a bit easier.

Is there another bar you could go to that has less of the hip hop, and maybe different sorts of people instead, the next time you want to go out?

The depot as in the music venue? Do we live in the same state? I went to a show there last night and it was pretty chill although some b***h standing behind me started trying to get me to dance at one point and that was a little annoying to say the least.

Honestly, a bar is not always a great place to make real relationships at. But you need to keep going out, not just once. We all have sh*****g nights. Pull your britches up and go at it again some other way!

Its harder to approach people in a sit down bar, try a bar or lounge where people stand more and there is more noise. I guess all you really have to do is to subtly let a guy know you like him and wait till he approaches you. Or, if you want to be bold you can approach him and comment on something you notice about him or the bar.

As for douches, you can just completely ignore them or make a joke about them, that should shut them down pretty quick. Just keep talking to the guy you are interested in and maintain eye contact. If he doesn't continue to talk to you then hes not interested and better to leave.