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Mitrovah
Deinonychus
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30 Apr 2014, 2:10 pm

There is a woman at the library I find very attractive, we have exchanged glances twice, and chatted briefly while she scanning the dvds I was checking out, I want to ask her out to a movie this friday. How should I go about this without things getting awkward and making myself look stupid.



CosmicRuss
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30 Apr 2014, 2:44 pm

I am no expert but would think perhaps asking if she'd like to meet for a chat over coffee first would be better. Going to a movie may be a bit too forward a suggestion at this stage.


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TheHermit
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30 Apr 2014, 10:01 pm

Coffee sounds like a better option than a movie. Less expensive for one, and you can actually talk and like look at each-other and other important stuff during the 'getting to know you' phase. (I'm assuming that's a phase?) Plus it seems less like an official date, so there might be less anxiety for both parties. I might have to try this out soon. I used to just ask for their number, but this seems better in that they have to decide then and there if they want to go further or not.


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monsterchic
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01 May 2014, 10:12 am

I'd echo the coffee idea. If someone came up to me at the library and asked me out for coffee, I'd probably faint lol Books and coffee--what could be better?



capricasix
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02 May 2014, 5:27 pm

If you want to chat with her a while before risking a date, why don't ask her opinion on one or two dvd's/movie/books? Say you need help to make up your mind. That should give you an idea how she stands up for her opinions, how she thinks and maybe if the chat is good you'll have an excuse to say it's going great and perhaps we can continue over a coffee?...
a) make her feel usefull
b) you want to know what she thinks
c) coffee is a way to say thank you for her interest/help/atention



goldfish21
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07 May 2014, 1:26 am

Does she engage you in conversation at all? If so, is it about the books/dvd's you're checking out at the library? Heck, even if not - lead the conversation there. ie whether she says hi or you say hi, let her know you're checking out the dvd titles to see if there's anything particularly good to watch. Maybe she'll make some recommendations, or comment on your selection.. but regardless, if you can get chatting about movies at all - then you can bring up that there's a show playing currently you'd like to go see & then just flat out ask her if she'd care to check it out with you. If you're feeling particularly bold, you could use the word "date," so as for her not to confuse your intentions for a "just friends," invite. Heck, even if your conversation is about books, or the whether, or the local sports team, or whatever, once you're engaged in some meaningful chit-chat you can steer the conversation over to the movie you'd like to take her to. "Yeah, these books (or insert topic) are great, but I'd like to switch things up and catch ____ movie this Friday.. would you like to join me?" So many ways to transition a conversation over to what you want. It depends on how it plays out in real life as to how you'll phrase it exactly. You don't want to pick one line and then try to rigidly rehearse it and make it work in any scenario, because chances are there won't be the perfect situation for your line to sound fluid and real vs. fake and rehearsed.. so, be flexible, but get to the point you want to make, ask your question, get your answer & then move forward either planning a date or knowing she's not interested.


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