How to Spot a Dangerous Woman.

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[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NeeZSXY_swo[/youtube]*sigh* I wish I came across this video years ago but it was too late for me hopefully others don't make the same mistake I did. there are dangerous men women need to look out for as well but very few videos discribing dangerous women. Before people jump in and shout mysogyny I am going to say this , this is not a man vs woman thread or about sexism or any of that its just advice and how to be aware of someone who can be potentially dangerous and abusive to you whether your a woman or a man!

So, only date women who are Not right for you, that you find uninteresting. unattractive, who don't find you particularly attractive either?

I've seen this video before & variations of it. They are made by some Fundamentalist Churches.
If she likes you, she's a vampire. If she doesn't like you, full steam ahead...even if she doesn't like you. What does she know.. She's only a stoopid woman.

Well sadly in my case it wasn't some church related case, the woman i was with was beautiful and I fell for her charm even though it seemed to good to be true and over time i didn't know her true colors till we lived together and find out she was a sociopath with possible narcissistic personality disorder and had a violent streak. She found out about my autism after I told her and she took advantage of all my weaknesses and purpously triggered my meltdowns and anxiety attacks. She would keep my friends from visiting and keep me from seeing my friends at times she would unplug the phone and hide it when I would want to call someone for advice and help. She would force me to have sex with her even when im not in the mood and always tell me I am worthless and pathetic she would also sometimes chase me with a kitchen knife and tell me to hit her whenever i was having a meltdown but I refused and hit myself instead and called me pathetic on that as well. She drove me to the point when my meltdown was so bad I was contemplating suicide and she egged me on and said I was only doing that for pity and that's when I actually slit my wrists and she laughed and said "my god your so pathetic" she left the house after that and my room mate called the ambulance and I spent 3 days in the hospital and in the loony bin under suicide watch under a 51/50.

Last edited by AspieOtaku on 19 May 2014, 2:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Either that Ninsmom, or if the particular girl is hanging out within your group of friends, and even when you aren't around... they get the opportunity to see if there is something not quite right with her. They will notice things you haven't. Even worse is they don't like it when others talk about the things she does behind your back because she considers it gossip and that you could have come to her to ask her about the "truth." This person gets defensive as a result and goes on the counter attack which would likely reveal that you have hit them with a truth that they don't want you to know about (the power and game ends when she realizes that you see her for who she really is)

It works for women too AspieMike & OP. Sometimes you need a more objective observer to cut through the smokescreen. Then it's up to you to either believe that things are not as they seem, or investigate further. or just swallow what she/he says & pay the price.
This video I think (?) has some others that follow. One of them states that 'Even when a woman is actively avoiding you, she is still using her feminine wiles to 'get you' by playing hard to get'.
Um no... If she is avoiding you, she is avoiding you.
More paternalistic B.S. from Far Right Churches/Cults that make sure that women can never be correct, or even honest.

Last edited by NinsMom on 19 May 2014, 2:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yeah... laughably obvious red flags in that video.

The sad truth is that men and women are capable of falling out of love just as they are capable of falling in love. You can have the most intimate connection you've ever experienced in your life, only to lose it all through the ebb and flow of time.

And sometimes neither person in the relationship is at fault for its demise.

People are constantly changing. Each day that we wake up, we're slightly different than the people we were yesterday. These small changes accumulate to large changes over time.

Even if there are no obvious red flags, even if you are truly in love and work very hard to build a healthy and strong relationship, you can still lose everything.

Many people don't want to admit this. We want to believe that if people invest enough time and love in each other, they'll grow old together as happy soul mates.

We also try to rationalize breakups by blaming ourselves or the other person, analyzing "what went wrong" as if there are always some mistakes that lead to the downfall of a relationship. We want to feel that the time was worth it, because even though the relationship failed in the end, we want to believe that we learned a lot, gained experience and wisdom.

And while it's true that we learn from failed relationships, one relationship doesn't really prepare us for the next, because humans are complex and each relationship is entirely different.

There will never be a successful guide/ book for serious relationships--only for "picking up" dates which is pretty worthless, in my opinion.

Nobody can teach you how to have a happy, loving relationship that lasts a lifetime. You have to learn on your own.

Last edited by mezzanotte on 19 May 2014, 2:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

So in other words the video is useless and I may never beable to identify an abusive woman? I may as well stay single and away from everyone then.

[quote="AspieOtaku"][quote="NinsMom"]It works for women too AspieMike & OP. Sometimes you need a more objective observer to cut through the smokescreen. Then it's up to you to either believe that things are not as they seem, or investigate further. or just swallow what she/he says & pay the price.
This video I think (?) has some others that follow. One of them states that 'Even when a woman is actively avoiding you, she is still using her feminine wiles to 'get you' by playing hard to get'.
Um no... If she is avoiding you, she is avoiding you.
More paternalistic B.S. from Far Right Churches/Cults that make sure that women can never be correct, or even honest.[/quote]So in other words the video is useless and I may never beable to identify an abusive woman? I may as well stay single and away from everyone then.[/quote]
*********************
NO!! ! I'm not saying that at all! You need to exercise a degree of caution in all areas of your life, as we all do. Don't fall in love too quickly. Don't get 100% involved too quickly.
Don't buy a car, new or used too quickly either.

Ive made those mistakes for sure gahh you read me like a book.

[quote="AspieOtaku"][quote="NinsMom"][quote="AspieOtaku"][quote="NinsMom"]It works for women too AspieMike & OP. Sometimes you need a more objective observer to cut through the smokescreen. Then it's up to you to either believe that things are not as they seem, or investigate further. or just swallow what she/he says & pay the price.
This video I think (?) has some others that follow. One of them states that 'Even when a woman is actively avoiding you, she is still using her feminine wiles to 'get you' by playing hard to get'.
Um no... If she is avoiding you, she is avoiding you.
More paternalistic B.S. from Far Right Churches/Cults that make sure that women can never be correct, or even honest.[/quote]So in other words the video is useless and I may never beable to identify an abusive woman? I may as well stay single and away from everyone then.[/quote]
*********************
NO!! ! I'm not saying that at all! You need to exercise a degree of caution in all areas of your life, as we all do. Don't fall in love too quickly. Don't get 100% involved too quickly.
Don't buy a car, new or used too quickly either. [/quote]Ive made those mistakes for sure gahh you read me like a book.[/quote]

******8
We are all part of that same stupid romance novel. We all do it. We try to fill the gaps in our lives with meaning, or excitement, or love. It happens. $hit happens!

I am going to get some weird suggested videos coming up on my youtube feed now...

But seriously, I lived with a roommate like that. She was super secretive, she made out like she was a victim. I knew a guy like that too. He was the only relationship I've ever had and looking back my younger self was niave and due to low self esteem I took what they dished out and if I questioned them I was put down and treated like I was the unreasonable one. I began to question my own sanity at times.

I think you learn as you get older. The last time I had contact with either him or the roommate was years ago and yes I suppose I've become overly cautious because of trying to second guess people, but I think that shouldn't put us off looking for love again. Not all people are out to use others. The majority are not headcases, so the odds are that the next person you fall for will not be a control freak with a personality disorder.

Don't let what one person did to you ruin your life.

How to spot a dangerous woman?

Easy, if something looks too good to be true then it probably is.

Let's go back to the early 1980's, young Eccles has signed up to Dateline Computer Dating and he meets 'Julie'.

Blonde
Beautiful
Figure to die for
Rich
Nice fast car
In other words NOT the sort of person who needs computer dating

The one thing that I haven't mentioned is that she had a mind like a sewer rat and she eventually drove me crazy, really crazy, psychiatric hospital crazy. I'm fine now but in talking to the hospital staff they reckoned that she was either a sociopath or a psychopath and I was lucky to get out alive.

That what he mainly said at the beginning of the video.

I've met two of them, one of them claimed she had brain tumor with numbered days (wasn't true; it miraculously "vanished" after few months).

I wish it was that simple I want to but I cant its hard its scary and its complicated.

I've watched the video earlier on today. I agree with everything that was said in the video. I think everyone of either gender who's looking for a partner or who has partner or acquaintance who's like that can learn a lot from this video. There's a woman who goes to my clubhouse who's exactly like this. She asked one of my friends for $40, saying that she needed it for medicine. She spent it at the casino.

Try looking up the behaviors of abusive people in general.
Here are a few sites.
Helpguide.org

This is abuse

Look up controlling behavior, narcissistic behavior, etc. How does the person express anger (you need to know this and see them angry and frustrated before committing yourself in a relationship).