Why did my friend refuse to tell me how he picked up girls?

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About 10 years ago, I used to be friends with this guy, who was *the* world's alpha-est alpha male. Hordes of girls pretty much lined up to have sex with him. He had something like 4 friends with benefits, along with frequent hook-ups. He also knew how to send a cold-call Facebook message to a girl classmate, invite her over to "help him study", and have sex with her that night. He'd message a girl on a dating site, meet her just two days later, and have sex with her on the first date. All this said, he was very good-looking, so there's that.

Me? I didn't have my first kiss until I was 20 (albeit thanks to him bringing me to a college bar), and paid an escort to take my virginity when I was 22. That, and almost get plastic surgery on my face.

Wow! Just wow! I asked him, I begged him, to share his tricks and tactics on how he met girls like that. He always refused, giving the most mundane and/or ridiculous excuses, like "it's different every time". Well, yeah, but aren't there methods that are common to every situation? When I asked him for advice, he'd tell me to "walk around shirtless in public, to show girls you're comfortable with your body". I knew right there and then he was lying to me. I pretty much stopped bothering to find out anything from him, and instead spent hundreds of dollars on PUA literature. Which I should have spent on an escort instead. Or even paid him, if he was willing to sell the information, rather than share it for free.

Now, my question: Why would my friend refuse like that? It's not like I was going steal his girls. I was attracted to different physical types than he was. Was it an evolutionary instinct, like joining forces with girls and fellow alpha males, to keep betas like me away from women? Was the instinct so strong, that friendship didn't matter? Some other reason?

Either way, I stopped being friends with him, for reasons that involved a credit card (irrelevant to this thread). But I do still wonder: why would he refuse like that?

Like AR1500 said, maybe he didn't want you to get better than him. Or maybe he was clueless about his success, and didn't want to look stupid saying he doesn't know what he is doing right.

He might have been a hookup or supplier for something. I could be way off, but maybe he was a contact for drugs even if it was just a little marijuana or ecstasy.

Certainly besides this, he's probably comfortable and confident, but if this was also going on, it makes him unique and gives him a kind of prestige. So in addition to charisma, he projects power, he is a "bad boy" taking a risk with the law, and girls who are high might easily be turned on by this.

It would also explain the secrecy.

I'd also speculate if this has something to do with the Credit Card, but I don't want the OP to get into that if it's not something they're comfortable with.

I think he didn't share because he had no idea how he did it and why it worked. That's similar to how NTs can't just write-down how social rules work, including their nonverbal communication. People simply has no idea how it works.

So I think people need to forget about the idea that there are easy scripts that can lead to success in dating. It doesn't work like that. There are innate algorithms that guide people's actions in courtship that are outside of our normal control and conscious thought processes, and therefor NTs cannot tell us how they do it, and even if they could, we cannot change our own algorithms to match those of NTs. The best we can do is to try to understand our own and take advantage of that knowledge.

Was he toned? How did he walk shirtless in public? lol

He probably was not lying.

There probably was no secret and thus no secret to tell. Charming + hot is a good combination. Charming just sort of is... it is not really "explainable", let alone transferable.

You have to come up with your own methodology in finding a soulmate.

Is picking up girls you probably wont come to care about who don't care about you really what you want? Sounds like that was more or less what he was doing. Sure maybe it looked cool he had all that female attention but one night stands really aren't that wonderful...and sounds like they are one of those types who has a lot of those. To each their own but even if he had shared his 'skills' with you it wouldn't be helping you get a relationship or girlfriend per say more just seducing women to sleep with you...somehow I doubt his approach got him a girlfriend or any sort of serious relationship.

Perhaps because his method is too good to share.

It sounds like he just thinks on his feet and doesn't really know how to explain his success. When you asked he probably legitimately did not know what advice to give you because it just comes naturally to him. It might be easier to get a more useful answer from someone who had to learn how to do that stuff.