I'm not a woman, but I will give you my piece anyways. This is not foreign to me. Is it o.k. no. Is it easier for them to get away with it than a man. Hell yes! These things tip the scales in there favor. Abusers know this. Abused women usually get it way worse though. Men get away with it too. If someone, or yourself is trying to believe that your circumstances "aren't that bad", it would be wrong for you to think so. Unless of course you like bondage. Sounds like she needs a bondage mate.
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Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.
Bruce Lee.