I'm hoping to get some advice as I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We moved in together very quickly but over time have come to a point where we can't live together anymore.
I have recently self diagnosed with mild aspergers and along the way of my research realised he is the same, although somewhat further along the spectrum. Suddenly lots and lots of things make sense!
We struggle with communication, the fact I need to stick to plans but he will often change them and not let me know, and I find it hard that he hasn't considered my feelings or just me in general. Also that he will never compromise and it appears to me he is selfish as a result, what he wants when he wants it. I think I'm older so have had more time to develop coping strategies and theory of mind but I'm sure I can't see all the wood from the trees either. I can understand he feels trapped and unrelaxed in a house which needs to be kept tidy and ordered so as to keep me calm but I feel if he loved me he would do the small things I ask in this regard (putting his dishes in dishwasher for example). We are so desperately frustrated and disappointed with how things are going and feel helpless as to how to fix things and know we can't keep hitting our heads against this brick wall.
Can anyone offer any advice?
19 Sep 2015, 2:59 pm
