Hello, This is my first post. I recently discovered that I have Aspergers. Looking back, though, it should have been caught much much earlier. I also have ADHD, giftedness, social phobia, and probable dyslexia.
I have been single for about a year and a half, and have never had what could be considered a "healthy" or "normal" relationship. My most recent relationship ended when I realized that ending up needing surgery because of your fiancee is not normal, and neither was being absolutely TERRIFIED of going home to him.
Recently I have met someone that I have absolutely no idea how to interact with. Usually I have at least some idea of what to expect people to do. He listens to me and remembers the small things I say/do even when I think nobody notices. He doesn't judge me, and treats me with a kindness I have never known. When I am stressed over not a perfect score on a test he tells me to relax and that I am doing fine. He is NT(I think) but understands my need to be alone and is a safe person to unload on. My dilemma is this: Does he like me or is this just 'kindness' that I have heard so much about?
He is one of those people who I have just felt comfortable around from moment 1. They are rare, and in my experience they all hurt me. He is no exception and has snapped at me a few times. But that was before my Aspergers was discovered.
Never told him I'm an aspie, just said I have trouble with social cues. Now he explains things to me instead of snapping. He has brushed hair from my face, got close to read a pin on my coat, grabbed my hand when reaching for a pen.. Usually when people get close like this or touch me, I am very very uncomfortable. Not so much with him. I trust him.
I do like him, he is 'safe' in my book in most situations and I find myself even 'hiding' behind him sometimes, putting him between myself and someone who is too loud or too set on forcing eye contact. Am I reading too much into this or not enough? I know I get attached to people very very quickly and don't want to ruin a possible friendship but also don't want to miss a possible relationship.
22 Feb 2015, 7:29 pm
