Was she playing 'games' and how to avoid it?

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It's 1:46 am where I live and I don't feel like going to sleep yet.

So I thought about making this post.

Basically, I'm a teenage guy and the closest to a girlfriend I got was 3 dates with a girl this year.

But last year I was also pretty close, as least I thought I was.

Basically, last year I was in the 11th grade. There was this girl who seemed to like me. She showed every single sign - she flirted with me, she became nervous around me, she complimented me, etc.

I decided to talk to her friend about it.

He said that it's probably not true and she probably does not feel that way about me.

Apparently she had just broken up with her ex-boyfriend and needed a lot of care and support right now. He said he believes that she only sees me as a friend.

I didn't take his word for it, because soon after SHE ended up asking ME out.

I said yes, and the next night on facebook I am talking about it with her.

But then she says, would you be okay if I brought my BOYFRIEND along as well?

I think she was just playing games. Not only did she just break up, but it was clear she had no boyfriend right now at all.

She was obviously playing a game - a trick. Playing 'hard to get' or mind games. Anything to test how hard I would be willing to try to go out with her.

Anyway, I wouldn't have any of it - I almost instantly cancelled the date.

A few months later, she ends up talking to my FRIEND. They really like each other and flirt a lot. Then my friend asks her to be his girlfriend and she says yes.

But she never tried to arrange a date with him. My friend said that he said to her that he is a little disappointed that she still has time to see her friends on the weekends, but won't even make the time to see her BOYFRIEND.

He said she instantly got very angry at him and that was the end of their 'relationship'.

She even started flirting another boy on the internet and I showed it to my friend.

Then one day we end up catching the same bus together. At the bus stop the girl talked to me and my friend. She was very FAKE, it was clear that she was angry at us or something but trying to keep it inside. She was pretending to act happy, cheerful, etc. but she wasn't and me and my friend could see right through it.

My question:

WHAT WAS THIS GIRL ACTUALLY DOING?

What were her goals? Her intentions?

Have YOU ever been through something like this? People who play 'games'?

And what is your advice for avoiding it in the future?

These types of girls, you will learn to deal with them in following ways:

1. Give them a taste of their own medicine and invite them out to environments where other girls that are interested in you are hanging out. (Jealousy game, and not really my style)
2. Simply ignore them when they decide they want to talk to you or communicate with you on FB, or any other media. This is more my style than the jealousy game written in number 1.
2a. Be on speaking terms face to face and keep things that way and don't communicate outside of school

My advice is to forget a such crazy one.

She's still a baby child in mind.

I'd suggest, depending on how important you think she is, to take it up with her. We have no way to know what's on her mind.

Also,if this was on FB chat, are you sure she didn't type something in the wrong window? Just checking since I don't have a clear picture of what happened and am trying to rule out the possibility of a misunderstanding.

Don't take it personally, its her problem, not yours.

she is just experimenting, but doesnt seem to have empathy for other people's feelings.

Forget her; she's playing you for a fool.

Who the hell knows. She probably doesn't either.


I don't think you can really prevent it from happening, but once you recognise it, which you seemed to early on, move on. I'd say you handled it pretty well from what you said, apart from the fact that it seems you were still a bit hung up on her as you observed her actions afterwards and told us about them. Once you recognise someone who plays games and doesn't display integrity, I don't think there's any point continuing to bother with that person at all, beyond basic required interaction (e.g. if you have classes together or something).