Never had a relationship or crush

Post Reply New Topic

Something that’s been on my mind quite a while now that i have never had a crush or felt actual love for someone,
In fact I find most people that try to chat to me are not looking for a relationship.
When I have sort of thought someone could be the one they only lied that they wanted a relationship just so they could get me to their house but I had to say no it was the second date.
And everyone I talk to I feel that they make fun of what I say and not understand me or completletly aloof.

You will at some point cross paths with the "right person", you just have to be patient.

At your age I also was yet to experience my first crush - it happened at 22.

No surprise you don't fall in love with people who ask you out - it doesn't work this way. A crush is when you see someone or get to know someone and at some point of time you realize you want them to yourself/want to have sex with them. It might happen fast (love at first sight/met) or gradually (from friendship to love, love through attachment).

Once someone falls in love they are in the difficult position of making the crush love them back (that's why they say "whoever falls in love first - loses", but I don't believe it - being in love feels awesome and "hunting" the crush is a fun game, although it comes with the risk of broken heart).
Your previous dates were not able to accomplish that, probably because they hurried too much or couldn't communicate with you properly. With enough patience and building the relationship slowly you would eventually feel love towards them.

BTW. What's wrong with taking you to their house? I invited my current crush into my house on our 2nd or 3rd date. We ate, watched some movies and that's it. No big deal. Truth is I wanted more but the mood wasn't right so I did nothing. Aren't you a little bit too paranoid?

Not having crushes is awesome. They’re bery hard. You become fixated and you end up feeling like crap.

i've never had a relationship i just struggle to click ideally i want someone who has an intellectual curiosity (did have a crush once which ended badly.... )

If you're searching for love, you'll find it when you least suspect it