Eyes and eye contact in L&D

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An old English proverb declares that eyes are the window of the soul.
I am a firm believer in this, along with "my body is my temple".
However, the latter is for another day and another topic Today we will discuss the matter of eyes and the use of eye contact in the real world, both around those we know and/or care about.

I feel there is a lot going on in my mind - hopes, dreams, ideals, secrets good and bad, memories, planning...it goes on and on. Infatuation and attraction are sometimes in the mix....anyways, going back to the proverb of the OP I do find eye contact very difficult even with my own family. There are very few instances I share it and that's during interviews or business discussions, or spiritual topics. I feel sharing my gaze is sharing all of these things with others and I'm simply not ready to share. i also find it to be a sensory overload.

There's more to this story but it's better everyone gets the opportunity to chime in with their thoughts and experiences first:
*Do you struggle with eye contact and if so, how?
*Do you feel there is an underlying problem for this aside from social anxiety and being on the spectrum?
*What is eye contact to you? Does it mean anything?
*How do you deal with looking at someone you like or are attracted to?
*Do you struggle with eye contact universally or only with set groups of people?

Discuss!

Eye contact for me is rather simple. I have it with people I like, and find interesting, and especially if I have a crush on somebody. I don't like to have "conversational" eye contact, and especially not with people I don't know or dislike (but I'm pretty good at faking it, but that's another story).

The thing about eye contact is it's important to make some eye contact, but not too much.

I do enough eye contact to show respect and that I'm listening to the person - no eye contact then I'm not listening very much unless I'm multitasking and I know the person very well. I'll give full eye contact only when I'm mad - maybe way too much.

You mean like the grumpy cat, Angela??

Yeah, Alex, it's important. But I guess I struggle with what I refer to as "personal" eye contact.

Mainly with the standards of society concerning this; western society sees eye-contact as a sign of respect, but both too much and too little are not good.
Easters society holds the idea that eye contact is a sign of (social) dominance, which is closer to how i feel about it.


I won't call is a "problem", but there is an explanation yes.
The eyes are the window to the soul, so if you make eye-contact, you stare in someones deep soul (and he in yours); this is highly uncomfortable, akin to standing naked in the centre of a mall

It is a strong social signal; it can either show agression, fear or love aimed to the person being looked at.

No problems really; only initially. once i know and trust a person, eye-contact becomes less and less painful, and for loved ones can even become pleasurable: showing deep love and trust becouse you allow them to see your deepest self

Pretty much universally, except for a few people, as indicated above
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