Why your life isn't over at 30

Post Reply New Topic

Firstly, I used to think the same thing, "I'm 26 and have done nothing with my life".

I was told by a wiser source: "Different things happen for different people at different times of their lives". And I realised this is true. a 19 year old girl might have had 5 sexual partners, a high paying job, a great figure and confidence.. but you don't know what this persons life is going to be like in 10 years. They might be stuck in a marriage that's boring looking after kids for the next 20 years. Doesn't sound like much of a life for me.

Whereas some peoples lives come alive later than others. This is what I'm striving to happen for me.

I would cry to Mum in my 20s (YES, recently) about these 19 year olds with high paying jobs and great figures and friends. And mum says "LIFE'S NOT FAIR BUT WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND".

Now we are born with significant health problems. I have a lot of mental health problems and physical health problems, plus aspergers. I'm trying to improve these. It's hard to make a go of your life when you sleep 18 hours a day because of medication and depression.

But the only people with the power to change this is us.

Also, as far as "clubbing" goes - I never went to parties at high school, I hardly ever went to any at university. I went to them when I got INTO a job. It wasn't until I got into a job that these opportunities opened up for me.

Right on, hale_bopp! It is true that many, perhaps most, inventors, artists and scientists do their greatest work before they reach thirty, but that is by no means absolutely true in all cases.

A book by Richard Bach called Illusions has a bunch of great one-liners in it. One of my favorite quotations is: "Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they're yours." In my own case, I am true to myself whether or not my path matches what others or society expect of me. How can I be other than who I am anyway, even if I wanted to?

I sometimes wonder about whether or not I will ever be discovered and have one or more of my original songs actually make me some money. It is troubling sometimes to think that most musicians who "make it" are already famous in their early twenties. I turned fifty-one years old this year. While I have always been promoting my web site the past decade, just this past month I started actively looking for and participating in places to play my music publicly such as open microphone nights at restaurants and bars. This past month I have also played regularly at a metaphysical book store and at a coffee shop. It may soon reach the point where I will have more places to play than I have time for, but it's all about letting people hear my music (which is difficult for them to do when I am playing guitar while riding my bicycle).

As for fame and fortune though, if I was into my music to make money or get famous I would have quit long ago. When I was a teenager I may have started playing guitar to be cool or attract chicks, but the music quickly became an end in itself and not a means to an end. The older I get the more I realize how this relates a lot to the "meaning" of life. Good luck to you, and thanks for sharing.

it is best to not become enthralled with others' exceptionally good fortune, as there will always be a few of those more fortunate, as well as a much larger cohort of those less fortunate, than us. we pay rapt attention to the lucky and the strong, while callously ignoring the unfortunate and weak, to our spiritual detriment.

Mine's only just getting interesting.

if i had my 25 year-old body [but with my present knowledge] i'd be as happy as a pup with 2 peters.

blank

I think Aspies in general are "late-bloomers", and I'm probably in the running for the latest of all...

It's extremely important to learn to be grateful for what you have, I heard somewhere that happiness is not about getting what you want, it's wanting what you have.

...and besides 30 is practically pre-larval from my point of view...

Absolutely true.

I'm 31, but with the way my life is going over the past few months, I feel like I've just turned 21. I made an attempt at a "normal" adult life at the age of 20, which failed miserably because, among other things, I simply wasn't ready. I spent the good part of the decade pretty much isolated from the rest of the world in what I guess would be a second adolescence (I'm sure I would have been considered a hikikomori in Japan). A family member was acting as an enabler, so when he passed away earlier this year, it sort of allowed me to, for a lack of a better term, grow up.

My life is just beginning. So what if I'm a late bloomer - in the end, it's not the length of the journey that matters, it's the experience.

Or, if you want to look at it another way, Hobbits don't become adults until they're 33. Tolkien might have been onto something.

It;s not a matter before or after 20, 30, 40.

If you don't change, nothing will change, even if you turn 80.

What kind of 19-year-old has a high-paying job these days?

I can't wait for 30.

I'll be 29 in a month and I never thought anything negative about 30s, I actually think it sounds awesome.

It's just a label either way and I like to think there would be some kind of difference but that's unlikely.

This was in the OP: "a 19 year old girl might have had 5 sexual partners, a high paying job, a great figure and confidence."

And that, in a fundamental sense, sounds awesome by me at 29, why would it change at 30? (it wouldn't)


I do agree in the sense that "what have you done with your life?", I haven't done the most either. But I am comfortable with myself. When it gets to a point it's not "how old are you" but rather "how long are you realistically going to live".

I don't know the answer to the latter but I have a feeling and as a result I imagine the 30s are going to be great, hopefully a calming influence, but if not fuckem.

I'm 25, ugly, no job, no education, not in shape (not fat though), have never dated, don't have any friends. and I still live with my parents.

What hope is there for me? What will change at 30? Will women magically want me then? Will I have any friends? Can I go back in time to avoid being in special ed and get a good education? Will I win the lottery?

The answer is no to all of those things, so I'm f****d.

I'm so sick of this s**t. I've been lonely, depressed, bitter, angry, and frustrated for a long time now. What's to stop me from feeling this way when I turn 30?

Heck why should I keep on living, where the hell do you people get your optimism from.

blank