Anyone else live in an ultra-conservative town?

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RealJALloyd
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13 May 2016, 9:24 am

I currently live Calvert County, MD, USA and I hate it here. I've lived here my entire life and I've had terrible luck on the dating scene. I'm 20 years old and have never had a girlfriend or even kissed a girl, but I've been on three friendly dates in high school. I have a job at my local grocery store and live with my parents, but I hate my area and feel that I need to move in order to increase my chances of finding a girlfriend. In my town, fried foods, high fructose corn syrup, "family values" and trashy clothing reign supreme, but the area is generally very hostile to my political beliefs and there's this disdain for artsy and intelligent people like myself. Though my county has a significant amount of liberals and a handful of Bernie Sanders supporters, my town is generally so conservative there's not even a term for it and there's virtually nothing to do that doesn't involve alcohol. Anyone else live in an area like this and feel trapped?



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13 May 2016, 9:49 am

It means that you take inventory of what you like and don't like, and make your own part of the world more livable, for you.

In general, I find ideologues, on either side of the political divide. No moderates.

I have an academic knowledge of it. I comment but do not participate.



RealJALloyd
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13 May 2016, 10:23 am

Unfortunately, I can't simply just make the best of where I live. My town is proof that time travel is possible. Once you drive past the, "Welcome to Calvert County," sign it's like you're stepping back into Germany in 1933. The times have changed, but the mentality is almost the same and my town is basically a caricature of all the worst aspects of America on both ends of the political spectrum. I really want to just pack up and leave, but it seems that employers are inflating the job requirements as I get older. Pretty soon, a bachelor's degree might be required to work at McDonald's. Also in my town (and many places in this country), you need advanced game to date any girl who isn't unattractive/morbidly obese and I have no way of improving my game. Many (but not all) of the girls my age in my area seem to only want to date jocks who own Ford F-350 pickup trucks, hunting rifles, wear camo and fly confederate flags. I on the other hand are the polar opposite of that.



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13 May 2016, 9:32 pm

I completely relate to what you're saying.

I essentially live in Australia's bible belt (don't bother googling it because it won't show up in the search results, it's NOT Hills district).

I live in a small city that is basically a 'big country town' according to some and this shows.

This place is hypocritical and ironic.

It boasts 'wholesome family values' yet is a cesspool for the decrepit and degenerate.

There is a high-crime rate (one of the highest not just in my state, but the entire country) hidden by the media, the highest STD rates in the entire state, statistically the worst drivers in the entire country.

Under its pretty, picturesque look, it's a backwards town of redneck hicks (referred to as 'bogans' here) and ultra-conservative stuffy old upper middle class arrogant rich people.

It is strongly religious, there's essentially a church on every street corner, yet it is aggressive in its religion and beliefs. Chirstians and Catholics are common, anything else is unacceptable.

Heavy in sexism, racism, homophobia, religious disrcimination, xenophobia, etc.

Also, it's just plain boring.

There is almost nothing here catered to the youth or anyone really.

Most of the events, clubs and groups here are for people who like gardening, farmer's markets and quiet little sunday markets. I can hear you yawning in boredom already, OP.

The history museum is free for locals, if all the history you want is to look at 17th century carts in a dusty old building.

We are known as the 'garden city' due to having the most parks in the country, yet most are ugly and poorly maintained anyway, and filled with broken glass bottles, syringes, and hotspots for criminal activity in general.

There IS NOT arts. There is one single theatre, apparently the biggest in the region (region = country) yet it's just all your typical travelling productions.

Music? All your wonderful country hit from the '70s, and some indie music played at the bars.

There are a handful of bars down town and one single nightclub and strip club.

Small city, population 100,000, one nightclub.

And, for that matter, about 4 gyms (1 crossfit, 1 squash/badmington, 2 regular).

Things would change when I'm an adult as at least I could barhop, but even the young adults here have no way to meet anyone and many polls conducted by the news say 90% think it's hard to meet new people or mae new friends and 10% say no.

Online is useless. It seems nobody here uses the internet as you can never find anyone online. On one dating site all I did was list she had to be not overweight, non-smoker and not right-wing.

Went from 70 men and women to just 10 men and women. 5 women to pick from.

On one of the biggest teen dating sites in the world, which has at least hundreds, if not thousands of users in the big city an hour away from me, has 2 females in my area.

You have to move OP to get the resuls you desire.

The vast majority of women in your town are probably redneck hilbillies who love men who binge drink, fish, are criminals and have lots of tattoos, etc.

Why would you waste 10 years of your life to meet women that would probably take you 3 months to meet if you lived in, say, NYC, or just a liberal and progressive/artistic city in general?

There's no point 'making the best' of a situation that is hopeless.

Do most refugrees living in a country where terrorists attac their village every night and r*pe their women and kill their children, Aand the village is low in food, water, and hs no defense? should they 'make the best out of their situation'? F*ck no, they should get the heck out of there!!



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13 May 2016, 10:19 pm

Outrider wrote:
I completely relate to what you're saying.

I essentially live in Australia's bible belt (don't bother googling it because it won't show up in the search results, it's NOT Hills district).

I live in a small city that is basically a 'big country town' according to some and this shows.

This place is hypocritical and ironic.

It boasts 'wholesome family values' yet is a cesspool for the decrepit and degenerate.

There is a high-crime rate (one of the highest not just in my state, but the entire country) hidden by the media, the highest STD rates in the entire state, statistically the worst drivers in the entire country.

Under its pretty, picturesque look, it's a backwards town of redneck hicks (referred to as 'bogans' here) and ultra-conservative stuffy old upper middle class arrogant rich people.

It is strongly religious, there's essentially a church on every street corner, yet it is aggressive in its religion and beliefs. Chirstians and Catholics are common, anything else is unacceptable.

Heavy in sexism, racism, homophobia, religious disrcimination, xenophobia, etc.

Also, it's just plain boring.

There is almost nothing here catered to the youth or anyone really.

Most of the events, clubs and groups here are for people who like gardening, farmer's markets and quiet little sunday markets. I can hear you yawning in boredom already, OP.

The history museum is free for locals, if all the history you want is to look at 17th century carts in a dusty old building.

We are known as the 'garden city' due to having the most parks in the country, yet most are ugly and poorly maintained anyway, and filled with broken glass bottles, syringes, and hotspots for criminal activity in general.

There IS NOT arts. There is one single theatre, apparently the biggest in the region (region = country) yet it's just all your typical travelling productions.

Music? All your wonderful country hit from the '70s, and some indie music played at the bars.

There are a handful of bars down town and one single nightclub and strip club.

Small city, population 100,000, one nightclub.

And, for that matter, about 4 gyms (1 crossfit, 1 squash/badmington, 2 regular).

Things would change when I'm an adult as at least I could barhop, but even the young adults here have no way to meet anyone and many polls conducted by the news say 90% think it's hard to meet new people or mae new friends and 10% say no.

Online is useless. It seems nobody here uses the internet as you can never find anyone online. On one dating site all I did was list she had to be not overweight, non-smoker and not right-wing.

Went from 70 men and women to just 10 men and women. 5 women to pick from.

On one of the biggest teen dating sites in the world, which has at least hundreds, if not thousands of users in the big city an hour away from me, has 2 females in my area.

You have to move OP to get the resuls you desire.

The vast majority of women in your town are probably redneck hilbillies who love men who binge drink, fish, are criminals and have lots of tattoos, etc.

Why would you waste 10 years of your life to meet women that would probably take you 3 months to meet if you lived in, say, NYC, or just a liberal and progressive/artistic city in general?

There's no point 'making the best' of a situation that is hopeless.

Do most refugrees living in a country where terrorists attac their village every night and r*pe their women and kill their children, Aand the village is low in food, water, and hs no defense? should they 'make the best out of their situation'? F*ck no, they should get the heck out of there!!


Wow, that's scary to read since my life in the US Bible Belt is pretty much this.

OP, you aren't alone in how you feel. Unless you drink, smoke, listen to country music like it's the music of the gods, claim to be a Christian but not take it seriously and only care about getting a cheap pass into Heaven, drive like a mad man, pick fights over stupid things, and treat women like they are just sex toys, you are pretty much locked out of the dating game. Definitely look beyond the shallow pond if you can.



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13 May 2016, 10:30 pm

...If Id grown up in my mothers bome countys seat...........


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13 May 2016, 11:59 pm

Yeah I live in the bible belt too and it's horrendous. It's the perfect example of religious hypocrisy where a bunch of arrogant rednecks think they're better because they're Christian. Not being Christian in these places pretty much ensures you will not find someone and be treated as a lesser. It's even worse when you're like me and don't espouse any particular religion at all.


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14 May 2016, 12:11 am

I live in a liberal,progressive area and it's terrible.



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14 May 2016, 1:04 am

It's even worse when a lot of your own family falls into this category, redneck hicks, so you can't meet any women through them because they're all overly-tomboyish strong-liqour, hunting fishing type cowgirls with humor for the idiotic and simple-minded.



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14 May 2016, 6:40 am

What. the. heck.

My family has found an entire town for sale for $750,000 and are convincing my step-dads rich sister to buy it for us so that we can live in it and run it ourselves...

As if I didn't already feel isolated enough where I live now, an hour and 45 minutes from the big city (which is where I want to be near), we'd be FOUR hours away in some small country town in the middle of fricken nowhere.

My dating options would go from the 100,000 population here to the very limited amount of girls and women my age in the new place.

This town only has 16 houses, 11 of which are rented.

11 f*cking families to meet!

There could be a total of one young female my age and she may not even be single, or better yet there could be none!!

Even if we attract more people through events and music festivals and tourist attractions and such, will that really bring that much more opportunity??! !!



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14 May 2016, 10:00 am

Nist498 wrote:
Yeah I live in the bible belt too and it's horrendous. It's the perfect example of religious hypocrisy where a bunch of arrogant rednecks think they're better because they're Christian. Not being Christian in these places pretty much ensures you will not find someone and be treated as a lesser. It's even worse when you're like me and don't espouse any particular religion at all.


Despite calling themselves Christians, they don't live up to what they preach. They go on and on about how Christianity is a religion of love but they hate LGBT people, call other walks of life 'weird' or 'evil', insist you speak English, and think women need to sit down and shut up. A lot of them don't even go to church and are more fascinated by the Friday night football game. They'll drink and smoke to excess despite how the body is supposed to be a temple for the Holy Spirit and sex is supposed to be saved for marriage but out of wedlock births are rampant here. They also think Hinduism is the same as Islam due to not reading anything because reading is for 'fags' in their outlook. For some reason, they think atheism is the same as worshipping Satan which is just completely ridiculous. Trying to explain that to them is like trying to teach a cat Shakespeare.



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14 May 2016, 12:52 pm

Sounds like my town. I went to school with pretty much everybody in my age group in my town. There is nobody for me to date and making friends is really hard. Everyone in this town is related six ways into Sunday. The popular rich families are connected by marriage. The white trash have babies out of wed lock with multiple partners and are on welfare. There are so many conservative hypocrite Christians in my town. I don't fit in with the hypocrite popular christians because I don't come from one of the popular families that have been in this town for generations. I don't fit in with the white trash because I don't believe in having babies out of wedlock, hooking up, and wearing very revealing clothes. I would love to live in a big city so I could meet new people and have more opportunities.



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14 May 2016, 1:09 pm

Outrider wrote:
My family has found an entire town for sale for $750,000 and are convincing my step-dads rich sister to buy it for us so that we can live in it and run it ourselves...
OMG, that would (literally) be like a dream coming true for me!


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14 May 2016, 4:24 pm

In my hometown, I have been openly mocked by some of the locals for my occupation as a chemist. They equate any form of science education as being evil. I have given up trying to understand them.



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14 May 2016, 4:38 pm

Most of the world is like that actually... except perhaps for Russia...

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14 May 2016, 8:42 pm

Outrider wrote:
I completely relate to what you're saying.

I essentially live in Australia's bible belt (don't bother googling it because it won't show up in the search results, it's NOT Hills district).

I live in a small city that is basically a 'big country town' according to some and this shows.

This place is hypocritical and ironic.

It boasts 'wholesome family values' yet is a cesspool for the decrepit and degenerate.

There is a high-crime rate (one of the highest not just in my state, but the entire country) hidden by the media, the highest STD rates in the entire state, statistically the worst drivers in the entire country.

Under its pretty, picturesque look, it's a backwards town of redneck hicks (referred to as 'bogans' here) and ultra-conservative stuffy old upper middle class arrogant rich people.

It is strongly religious, there's essentially a church on every street corner, yet it is aggressive in its religion and beliefs. Chirstians and Catholics are common, anything else is unacceptable.

Heavy in sexism, racism, homophobia, religious disrcimination, xenophobia, etc.

Also, it's just plain boring.

There is almost nothing here catered to the youth or anyone really.

Most of the events, clubs and groups here are for people who like gardening, farmer's markets and quiet little sunday markets. I can hear you yawning in boredom already, OP.

The history museum is free for locals, if all the history you want is to look at 17th century carts in a dusty old building.

We are known as the 'garden city' due to having the most parks in the country, yet most are ugly and poorly maintained anyway, and filled with broken glass bottles, syringes, and hotspots for criminal activity in general.

There IS NOT arts. There is one single theatre, apparently the biggest in the region (region = country) yet it's just all your typical travelling productions.

Music? All your wonderful country hit from the '70s, and some indie music played at the bars.

There are a handful of bars down town and one single nightclub and strip club.

Small city, population 100,000, one nightclub.

And, for that matter, about 4 gyms (1 crossfit, 1 squash/badmington, 2 regular).

Things would change when I'm an adult as at least I could barhop, but even the young adults here have no way to meet anyone and many polls conducted by the news say 90% think it's hard to meet new people or mae new friends and 10% say no.

Online is useless. It seems nobody here uses the internet as you can never find anyone online. On one dating site all I did was list she had to be not overweight, non-smoker and not right-wing.

Went from 70 men and women to just 10 men and women. 5 women to pick from.

On one of the biggest teen dating sites in the world, which has at least hundreds, if not thousands of users in the big city an hour away from me, has 2 females in my area.

You have to move OP to get the resuls you desire.

The vast majority of women in your town are probably redneck hilbillies who love men who binge drink, fish, are criminals and have lots of tattoos, etc.

Why would you waste 10 years of your life to meet women that would probably take you 3 months to meet if you lived in, say, NYC, or just a liberal and progressive/artistic city in general?

There's no point 'making the best' of a situation that is hopeless.

Do most refugrees living in a country where terrorists attac their village every night and r*pe their women and kill their children, Aand the village is low in food, water, and hs no defense? should they 'make the best out of their situation'? F*ck no, they should get the heck out of there!!


I'm in Mildura... Ice use & family violence seem to be major roadblocks for the town at the moment. I actually don't think it's possible to find a decent partner here at my age. The good ones are married with kids by about 25.