Sick of being abnormal

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I'm tired of not being able to do something that is a natural part of life for most people. I have no idea how people are actually managing to get together and have relationships, it just seems impossible for me.

Whenever I meet someone and there seems to be a spark I can't maintain it. It just all disappears like there was never anything there at all and I'm left wondering if I just imagined it.

I hate this. I just feel trapped inside of myself. I want to change, but I don't know how to. This will just go on and on, this hoping and getting disappointed until I eventually get to be dead.

I wish I could see you, so I could offer good advice.

You seem like a nice woman.

I believe your day (in a positive sense) will come.

If it gives you any hope at all, I felt this way up until semi-recently. I am 32 years old, almost 33, and I have "faked" my way through my few relationships. As harsh as that may sound, I felt as though I could trick myself into caring about a person. I wanted so badly to just be "normal" - whatever that means. Of course, the "chase" is always somewhat interesting to me, but after 2 months or so, I find myself completely bored and devoid of any feeling. The change came when I started dating someone roughly 2 years ago that I had been interested in for some time. Though I don't think he would ever be open to admitting it, he is an Aspie. If he wasn't, I don't think we would still be together. He understands me in ways that others have not been able to, and vice versa.

It's not me who is losing interest though. It's the men.

Is it possible that you are attracted to men that aren't compatible with you?
That your ideal/type is not suited to you as you are.

Being sick of it won't do you any good. You will need to figure out strategies that make life better for you.

Like I said, I wish I knew you in person.

Then I could help you better.

You seem to have your head in a pretty good place.

Maybe it's the guys who are the fools?

Yup, this is true.

I don't think my head is in a good place at the moment and I think that's what the real problem is. I just need to calm down and go with the flow.

I agree with the "going with the flow" part.

When I said your head is in the "right place," I meant in terms of you philosophy of life, and of gender relations.