Dating when you come across as childlike

Post Reply New Topic

I come across as pretty childlike to people. Probably because of my mannerisms, loving cute animals, enjoying the moment and the way I think. I try to hide that on my dating profiles, but the childlike stuff always creeps back. I know some people find childlike traits attractive, but they're never the people I want to attract. It's either closeted pedophiles, hypermasculine bro types or geeky atheists. I don't even want to attract guys. I want to attract girls. I just think my childishness is scaring them all away. How can I make myself seem like someone girls would actually see themselves dating?

Eh, but childlike girls are the cutest! I think I would prefer to date a girl who is childlike...

I guess if you can recognize what you're doing that makes you seem childlike, you can try to avoid it. But if childlike is a personality trait you have, then it's no good to cover it up all the time.

I recognize what comes across as childlike and I can hide it. I just can't think of what else to put in my profile.

Why don't you leave the profile blank and invite them to make up their own persona for you?
Then you can adapt to whatever attributes they find attractive and you won't have to guess what kind of person to be.

Of course, you could just BE WHO YOU ARE.

That would work too.

For now I prefer tinder because I don't have to fill out my profile. Like I said before being who I am only attracts sh***y people.

Dating sites sound horrible.

So, you have to pretend to be someone else to attract the kind of people you like?
Then what happens when they find out you're different to what they expected?
Maybe they're also pretending to be someone else.

All the world's a stage.
This is why the origin of the word 'person' is 'mask'.

You kind of do if you want don't want to attract the wrong people.

It seems ironic that you have to make yourself into a 'wrong' person to find someone who's right.

I really think you should be yourself. I don't think that you seem childlike.

Really? Several people have told me I come across as childlike.

Not to me. I don't know what you are like in person, though. People in real life think that I'm childlike, and I really don't care, because that's just the way that I am.

Being into optometry is not child-like.

Devilkisses you don't sound childlike to me you just sound really cute!

Maybe you could go for more masculine girls (if you like that type). Are there any lgbt groups or bars in your area you could go to to meet people. You could even take a friend woth you to be your wingman

My friend is a girl who is gay and used to ask me to come with her all the time. I'm very childlike in my interests and mannerisms and many of the ladies at these bars would compliment me and ask me out. To the point I wished I was gay because they were so lovely.

I have met many women who are into cutesy women and it would be a shame for you to have to act around someone all the time and notbe comfortable to be yourself. The perfect partner is someone who loves your weirdness not someone who shuns it

Maybe the problem isn't the chidlike mannerisms but meeting the right people. Maybe try a website where you can exclusively be matched with women?

Waah sorry this is so long

You asked for your profile to be reviewed.

It was that which came across as childlike, but you said you were doing it to attract outgoing people. You wanted to appear outgoing, even though by your own admission you more introverted.

You wanted to cutout of the profile, parts that showed your real personality.

Maybe you could try a different dating site, where you might be able to attract different kinds of people.

I spent many years with this kind of dilemma - I wasn't the type of person that the type of person that I was attracted to would be attracted to. But in my situation, I somehow gave off (without intending to), the impression that I WAS the type of person they would be attracted to - they would get a false initial impression of me. I would try to keep it going, but eventually, they would realize I just wasn't what they were looking for as they got to know me (which could take some time, as I was shy). Then I would be left, and heartbroken, having my hopes dashed.

I hate to break it to you, but you really can't keep up any fake persona anyway, so it's better to be yourself. You can't hide your true self forever, and it hurts to be left over and over even if you managed it in the beginning.

I finally wised up and now I am married to someone who truly accepts me for who I am. He is nothing like the guy I thought I wanted to attract - instead, he's the guy that I really needed, without realizing it! The relationship is the smoothest, most secure, and most fun that I have ever had, and also very healing. It is the easiest one, too. As we got to know each other, I began to see why things were actually working well - and it was all so different from what I had been searching for before, thinking it was what I wanted, what would make me happy.

Part of my problem was this - I think I was looking for the wrong guys because I didn't want to deal with some aspect of myself. I saw myself reflected in the guys I would date, instead of facing the reality of me. If that makes any sense, maybe I'm not explaining well.

Anyway, I hope you can be patient enough to find someone who will really be attracted to you and have fun with you just the way that you are I do think there are people who would share your interests, and they, too, are probably wondering where/how to find their match.