Weird sexual orientation

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I'm not sure what the name for my sexual orientation is.

I don't care that much about sex, like I have no interest in porn for example and I don't look at guys who I know nothing about and have a desire to have sex with them.

However, I experience a low level of sexual attraction to people I know a little about. I think if I was actually in a relationship with someone, I'd be interested in sex, but it's not my biggest desire in a relationship. Emotional connection is more important to me.

Also, if I find out someone has a horrible personality, I'm repulsed by them even if I was originally attracted to them, but if I met a guy online and liked his personality, but later found out he was ugly, unless he was really ugly, I may be slightly less attracted to him, but it wouldn't be as strong of a turnoff as an attractive person with an awful personality.

Heterosexual?

sounds like most women

There's nothing weird about that at all. That is actually how I operate as well.

I was expecting something really kinky.

There is nothing unusual about what you have posted, I'd say many woman think the same. The only thing of note I really got from the thread was that you seem to have a desire to find "labels" to attach to yourself.

I agree. I don't think it's weird at all. A lot of times people that are really attractive know it and can be kind of stuck up. Big turn off, I like someone whose socially withdrawn and intellectually curious.

I agree with everyone else. Sounds like a pretty normal heterosexual female.

If you're looking for a really technical label, it sounds like you are heteroromantic. Sex isn't a priority for you. Romance, as in emotional love and connection, is more important.

I'd just like to say to those bringing up labels: they aren't inherently bad. Placing labels on someone else is problematic because it's generally a stereotypical label based on quick judgement. When a person is looking for a label though, they're looking for clarity on issues they face-- they're looking for similar people. Without the label of autism, how many of you would have found this board? Searching for people with similar circumstances is not wrong, it's human nature, and labels actually help on that front.

Edit: To clarify, that doesn't mean I think labels can't be misused by both the individual trying to conform to the label, or the society at large that uses the label in a punitive manner. I'm pointing out that in cases like these, where a person is looking for answers, a label can actually help them find their pack.

You might be the type of heterosexual female who only desires the "right" man.

Agreed. Seems actually quite normal. I know my wife/ex was impossible to turn on if things were going bad with us at the time. The times things were good, I could turn her on doing basically nothing. I've always thought your opinion to be the standard among females.

I'm actually not all that different, though probably the guy version. I do still have SOME primal lust instinct. I mean, I can look at a woman and be attracted purely on a basis of her body. But that's very short lived, and I could never do anything about it. Even in porn, I'll spend awhile looking for the right clip where the chick looks "cool" to me. Like, I'd envision hitting it off with this girl, having a great time, and then this porn clip is what happens when we get home. That's more or less the only way it turns me on most of the time.

I'm coming off of a long marriage where mechanically, our sex could not have been better. It's be hard to imagine how it could get better. But there was basically zero emotion tied into the sex. It really was like shooting a porn scene a few times a week. Which was fun, don't get me wrong. But did have an emptiness to it. That may not sound odd to a woman, but for a man it's quite odd. Especially one as sexually driven as me. I just need a singular focus for my drives.

It sounds like you will be just fine in a relationship as it relates to being physical at an appropriate level. Finding the right person you get along with and can make you comfortable and excited enough to want to explore. You just probably need a man who knows how to treat you the way you want to be treated, however that may be. For most women, that comes first, and sex just becomes a natural extension of that connection because you wish to make this person feel good.

So was i, like a Dendrophile, P/F or Mechanophiliac. The word "weird" should be used sparingly.

I'm kind of the same way because it seems like being able to relate to someone is one of the most important things to me when it comes to being attracted to someone. Sometimes I have online crushes when I don't know what they look like, but at the same time I don't feel as attracted to guys irl. I also feel turned off by jerks, but it seems like a lot of people are attracted to those types.

Given the information about your attractions, you just sound like someone who is prudent in choice, rather than it being a any kind of weird sexual orientation.

I think both men and women often get conflicted in terms of attraction. I think for many of us who don't mix logic and emotion, but rather can maintain logic even in strong emotions, it's easier to be attracted to "what you like". I think often why many women appear to like jerks, is because they either aren't really jerks and just come off that way to others, which is possible because I can be like that, or it's simply a physical only response to the way someone appears. For most people, male or female, confidence is attractive. Theoretically for some. But it is. The idea of someone knowing others want them physically makes people project a certain energy about them which is alluring.

I know I find a flirty, sensuous, confident woman to be very attractive. Theoretically. Of course I know that the ones that are like that will usually carry personality traits that I cannot tolerate. So, I then associate confidence with being a b***h basically. And that's a huge turn off for me even if the woman would have initially turned me on just based on how she looked and presented. So I rather have gravitated toward more shy, introverted types because they don't have that energy.

People with that "energy" to me dont appear to be very faithful in long term relationships.