How to go from just talking to a girl to asking her out?

Post Reply New Topic

I can talk to girls, I mean talking to them normally but I have a hard time transition from just talking to asking them out. I never know how to when or how to say it without it sounding creepy. Like it would just come out of the blue at the wrong time.

It was always easier on dating sites because I already knew they wanted someone to go out with them but now I'm talking to a girl on Facebook who I've been acquainted with for a few years. I have a conversation going but I'm not sure when, how or if I should ask her out.

I'm trying to strike up a friendship with her but I'm not sure if it's better to be friends with a girl before asking her out or if it's better go transition more directly to dating.

She's talking to me a lot more than she used to so she seems interested but I'm not sure if she's that kind of interested. How do I tell?

The best thing to do is to veer the conversation toward what you believe you are both interested in. Such as Retro Games.

If there's some sort of Retro Games convention somewhere,

Or anything pertaining to an interest you share, propose that you attend said convention together.

Or if you both like a certain movie that's playing in the multiplex, propose that you both go see that movie, then go to some sort of place like Applebee's afterwards.

Good idea. I should find out which movies she likes and then offer to take her there.

Or somehow segue into offering to take her to a restaurant.

I don't think she's that interested in games, I think maybe she only used to play games because her exboyfriend wanted her to.

I don't know if this is good idea but I'm been trying to offer her emotional support after she went through a bad breakup (her boyfriend turned nasty) and dropped out of university (for reasons I'm trying to figure out). That will either build an emotional connection or it will cause her to think I'm like her sister

I'm always worried with girls that if they do hint they want me to ask them out I'll miss the queue because I'm bad with subtext. When she moved in with her sister and brother in law and niece I commented that it was a full house.

She said "yours or mine?" I wasn't sure if this was a really tearse propisition or if she was asking if my house or hers was full. I said "yours is" and she said "oh haha yeah kinda". I can't help but wonder if I missed something. I hope I don't friendzone myself.

I would offer the emotional support if you feel you identify with what she is feeling.

It's good to offer an ear to someone who feels he/she wants to be listened to.

If I haven't experienced something, though, I would qualify it by saying: I haven't experienced this particular thing....but it seems likely that, it seems logically, it would make sense that......

In the "yours or mine" situation, I would say "mine." Or better yet--a neutral spot until you folks get to know each other better.

What happened with your girlfriend?

She dumped me.

I thought you said you came back together. Did you do something or is she nuts?

She dumped me again. The reason she gave is because she was too depressed to be in a relationship. There were signs of this before she dumped me. She spent a lot of time by herself in her room.

Anyway, I asked this new girl out for coffee. She said yes. I'm not sure if she thinks of it as a date or just a platonic thing. She did put a lot of smiley faces into her response so maybe that's a good sign.

Good luck!

That's awesome, dude!

I know that you Americans are probably asleep now but for anyone who's awake and reading this I have a question about tonight's date.

How can I make sure she gets that it's a date and not a platonic thing?

Or if you does turn into a platonic thing can I still transition from friendship to dating?

No, you can't.

Or if you do it won't be ideal.

It's just my opinion and experiences, but a male is more likely to be attracted to his female friend than the opposite.

The woman is more likely to see the friendship as strictly platonic.

You've got to flirt with her/hint it to her, somehow, without coming on too fast or too strong.

Compliment her on what she's wearing when you see her but don't make it sexual in anyway.

"That's a very nice shirt, it suits you. " or "I love what you did to your hair, very pretty. ".

Keep things light and casual.

Ok, I will attempt to flirt with her. I'll compliment her on her hairdo, her eyes, etc.

I already her sh sh beautiful several times last night. She was grateful for this, though also expressed disbelief, as beautiful girls often do.

Is there anything else I should do to flirt with her? Anything else I should say or express nonverbally?

I don't have enough experience to be giving advice, but I think you're beyond the age of such banalities.

I would have said that I was very happy to see her and that she made my day by sharing the hot beverage moment with me. Later perhaps say that you would like to see her more often.

Retro gamer eh? I grew up in a console-free home, always had just the PC. Not many regrets, but I do sometimes wonder what the scene was like on other systems. Last year I picked up a C64, and two Amigas to restore. I was surprised how few decent games there were, the PC really did (and does) have all the best stuff. My interest is mostly from system architecture standpoint anyway, and Commodore machines are fairly unique. What are you into?

Oh, of course.

He could have kept it gentelmenly too.

I actually strongly agree with this.

I've always been about chivalry and gentlemenlyness regarding dating.

I was in a hurry though at the time but I still hope what i did say did some good.

Being polite works but sometimes you've got to show some physical interest.

I've expressed stuff like "I enjoyed my time with you. " and such and it still may be mistaken as just friendly.

Physical interest. As in non-sexual physical contact. Got it.

I don't think this will offend her too much as according to the ex she's kind of a nympho. And she's been acting real friendly to me too.