Words to introduce yourself

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What are some words or phrases other than "hi" or "how are you doing? " to introduce yourself?

"My name is Enzo Amore and I am a certified G and a bonafide stud and you can't teach that! And this right here, this is Big Cass and he's 7 foot tall and you can't teach that! And this right here, this is Carmella and she's hot as hell and you can't teach that! Bada boom! Realest guys in the room! How ya doin!"

How'd you do? I see you've met my faithful handyman. He's just a little brought down because, when you knocked, he thought you were the candyman. Don't get strung out by the way I look - don't judge a book by its cover. I'm not much of a man by the light of day, but by night I'm one hell of a lover.

No cheesy PICKUP lines please.

Just say your name, and that it was a "pleasure to meet you."

"I'm so and so and I'm not an Aspie"

Or "Hi " usually works.

Frankly, if they are not attracted to you nothing will work, and if they are attracted to you you'd have to be a total moron or super lame to fail.

EDIT: Don't overthink it. Don't even think about what you should say. Just say what you want.