Infidelity? Why the silent treatment? please help.....

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My AS partner is away in another country. I have been told that he has been seeing another girl behind my back. When I ask him about these rumours by text or email he will not answer or explain anything. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt but I do not understand why he will not answer. If he is not having an affair then why not just say that. He once before had a strong friendship with a different girl that I am sure was just infatuation or an obsession. He was not unfaithful in a sexual nature.

I have had this communication difficulty before when it had turned out that he had not been unfaithful at all. Just the same as now he would not say yes or no.
Please can somebody help me to understand why I get no response to my questions. He knows that being evasive and silent is hurting me, but still wont reply. Is he afraid of a response he will get or worried that he will have more questions to answer? What do I do? Im getting so stressed out thinking that I have been cheated on and at the same time sure that he has been faithful.

help, im desperate...

I don't know...mine never said anything either...and even though I caught him "red-handed"...I never said too much of anything...

I actually welcomed the silence...I was afraid anything more would have just made it hurt worse than it already did and the wound would never heal...and I wasn't ready to give up then.

Maybe that's why it continued.

Beenthere - Is or was your partner AS?

I've been in this type of jealousy, but
have always insisted on complete truth.
I don't think that I could live with a situation
where a direct question of such importance
was ignored.

He was NT....I'm an Aspie.

We are divorced.

thankyou beenthere. Imlooking for some advice from anyone who has had this sort of mis-communication with an AS partner or if you are an aspie then maybe give me some insite to why he is acting like this. Thank you all. I read everywhere that AS partners are mostly faithful

Wrong.
My first husband whom I suspect had AS cheated on me with 3 different people over a period of years. He avoided the topic or pretended to be faithful...I doubt to this day he has any idea as to the totally painful situation he put me in with 2 of these people. I'd say if he's not talking about it, you need to tell him it's bothering you deeply and if he is still giving you the cold shoulder, I'd be suspicious.
I'm sorry, but I just would be. FYI I also have AS and have been in a situation that technically could be called me being unfaithful after my first marriage.

The only reason people with AS would be more faithful than anyone else would be due to their anxiety or something - not by some enhanced respect or loyalty above the average person.

AS can find the idea of blame / fault difficult. Also he probably doesn't want to lie or hurt you. That is why he might be silent. If he has an infatuation or affair. It could be difficult seeing things in shades of grey.

Actually come to think of I don't answer things that I don't think it is worth answering. People are always being accused of things, it can be annoying.

Maybe you could ask him what he wants rather than asking him whether is doing something (allegedly)

True. My wife and first gf were likely aspies.
I'm pretty damned certain that I am. In each
of these cases, there was infidelity from every
one of the involved members - at least by a
strict definition (there were occasional confusing
circumstances, but one would hope that their
partner errs conservatively, I think).