I feel like fool?

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We were together on and off for few years and we live 4 hours apart.We had a strong connection but the distance eventually took its toll and he broke it.After time apart we will reconnect and hangout again.This went on and off for few years until he met someone closer.Prior to that he started not treating me with the same level of commitment and enthusiasm that I was extending to him.He would run hot and cold.So when it became apparent that he had new interest closer I told him it's best we go separate ways as it was painful for me to watch him date someone else.He agreed and we cease contact ,expecting not to hear from him again.

I went on with my life until this past year I noticed that he sent me a message back in May 2015 through someone's else account since he deleted his own Facebook. He left his number to text him and says he missed me like crazy.




I didn't see these messages at that time since I didn't check my message request. Then a month later,he creates a new Facebook. I noticed this because he appeared on people you may know list..The profile had only one pic and 2 friends from his town ... we had no mutual friends. Then the profile disappeared a month later.At this point I was still unaware of the messages he had sent a month ealier.I went on with my life.




Then he sent several messages using one of his friends Facebook account this year in 2016 again,saying he misses me and left his number again to text him.For some reason these messages didn't show up at that time.Then a month later he creates another Facebook again .He messaged me saying he misses me.




I finally open the messages request that's when I saw all those messages he sent. I thought he genuinely wanted me back based on his level if effort so I texted him back.He was happy to hear from me and said he misses me.We caught up with our lives and exchanged recent pics.


It wasn't long before he turned cold again. He started treating me like an afterthought ,not keeping Skype dates,then started acting more flaky by not texting when he said he would etc.He was supposed to come visit me but didn't follow through with it.He gave some bs excuse as to why he can't do this and maybe we might be together in the future.He went dark again and ignored further contact from me.I think there's someone else in the picture


I came to a realization that I can't be mad at him anymore at this point.He keeps hurting me because I ultimately run back to him expecting different results.It's been 4 months since and I changed my number after a month of him ditching me again, then deactivated my face book so he can't reach me if he wanted to.I'm so hurt and it this time with greater strength . I can't stop beating myself for running back to him after what he put me through. Why? Why did I think it was a good idea to have contact with him again? That things will be different ?That he will start putting more effort into me and make me a priority? That it will work out again?I feel so stupid and responsible for my own heartbreak.

Has anyone been through the same ?How did you recover being hurt over and over by the same person?

You're not a fool.

This guy is just using you; it seems obvious to me. Whenever he gets what he wants, he gets "cold."

Find somebody else.

Stick up for yourself. Don't be like other girls who blame all men for their mistakes.

"Has anyone been through the same ?How did you recover being hurt over and over by the same person?"

Yep. You recover from the hurt by realizing that that person is just using you as an ego boost. When they need an ego boost, they know they can throw you a crumb and you'll come running. You recover by cutting that person out of your life entirely. Never make someone a priority who only sees you as an option.

Don't blame yourself. Instead: learn from this. You gave it a chance, but he didn't change. And never will.
So i agree with Luhluhluh: recover by realising you are not his priority, and that you deserve to be someones priority.

And for the hurt... here's a [hug].
Love sickness heals by giving it enough time to fade away. Always longer than you want, but one day you'll wake up feeling better, and better the next day, etc.

I think cutting him out of your life is the best idea, sounds kind of like he's just using you as a back up...like if things don't work out with other girls he has interest in he comes back to you. Also if he's the only reason for deleting your face-book, why not just block him or something.

Thank you everyone for your answers and @Sweetleaf ,I can't block him on face book since he doesn't have an account anymore. He uses his friends or open a new one when he contacts then baits me.Anyways,I keep in touch with my friends and family on WhatsApp and phone.I will reactivate my face book eventually ...as for now I just want to recover from this with 100% certainty that there won't be any contact from him