Can you help out in an arguement between me and my friend?

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Basically he thinks that if you give a girl your number or just invite them out on a date without getting to know them that they will go out with you. I've explained that unless he's really lucky he has to know a girl a bit in real life or online before they decide to go on a date with you, espically if your an aspie. His arguement then was, his method is how all Americans date. My conclusion was probably mainly in movies or it was instant attraction. We're both on this forum so I'm going to post my thread to him, but it do you think your more likely to date a girl if you get to know them first?

well no, apparently I cant even talk to people.

I say things, but lets be real everyone ignores me, even my boyfriend gives me annoyed looks if I start to go on about any topic. Like sometimes I still think i just shouldent talk people probbly dont pay attention to even half of what I say anyways.

First, I'd challenge him to document that "all" thing.
Second, that's a dangerously naive attitude.

Well, is there any other way to discern and weed out the crazies who will make you life hell like my brother's first wife did? Like my ex stepson's first wife did? Like my neighbor's first husband did?

I generally just tell these kinds of people that Television is Not Reality,
but if that method actually works for him, then whatever floats his boat is his own to use.

yeah,that will definitely work. Soon he will meet his soulmate. lol

Don't date your friend, because he will be finding his soulmate momentarily.

Note taken. I do hope his soulmate comes waltzing in soon though, would save me a lot of headaches!

Jeeze, ignore my first post...I was feeling a little down on myself and posted it out of frustration, its not true though really. Lol I do sometimes cut people off by accident and such and can get irritated looks, but that's reasonable...I was just beating myself up over it for some reason.

Anyways on the topic of this thread, I don't think you necessarily have to know someone too well to ask them out. I met my boyfriend on okcupid, and we did talk on there for a bit and then exchanged numbers and texted some before we met up in person...but I wouldn't say we really 'knew' each other before that first date. It was during that date and the following ones where we really got to know each other.

As for meeting IRL well yeah you can give people your number even if you don't really know them, since it's up to them if they are interested in contacting you further or not. Main thing there is just not being pushy or trying to pressure them. My sisters boyfriend just asked her out on a whim like that...she was working at some coffee shop or something and he came in and gave her his number after getting coffee and she thought it was cute and found him attractive so she dated him and they're still together. But yeah he was certainly taking a risk she could have nastily rejected him and said 'oh I'm at work', she could have just ignored his attempt all together...if you cannot handle the prospect of someone rejecting your attempt then it is probably best not to give random girls your number or vice versa. But if you can maturely deal with being rejected then go for it.....

But how do you get to know them without dating them? I mean if one has a circle of people they know and some of that circle is available then yeah its possible to get to know someone before dating them....but if you don't have a circle or your circle doesn't have anyone date-able for you then what?

Lol like my circle everyone would have be either too young, is homosexual or some other incompatible sexuality, or already in a relationship...so there wouldn't have been anything to choose from.

Maybe he believes that he'll end up in the just friends category if women know him abit. I became attracted to women after I knew them abit but I was always in the just friends category with them. The one time a woman was actually interested in me offline was a stranger & that was two weeks before my 2nd girlfriend broke up with me instead of two weeks after I met my current girlfriend & both exes on forums & we did know each other quite a while before meeting up but forums work differently than offline dating.

You can tell your friend is a complete p**** slayer with that mentality.

if anything you have less chances of getting into an actual relationship if you just met a person and start dating. He probably has been friendzoned before and is scared of that happening again. The only thing you are likely to get out of dating someone you don't know is a one night stand and a feeling of regret the day after.

But how do you get to know someone you don't already know without dating them? You can go on dates and wait till you've gotten to know each other better before having sex.

It really depends on what kind of girls you ask (40 yr old businesswomen vs 20 yr old party goers), what kind of situations you do the asking (inside a bank vs inside a pub), and how attractive (physical, personality, coming-across-as-intelligent) the person asking is.

For the record, I enjoy one night stands, so do most people I have had one night stands with.