No Love

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When I was younger, I had a lot of long periods of crushes (probably limerence); some lasted for years. Of course, none led to something.

A couple of years ago, something switched in my brain - I am not developing nor having any crushes anymore; I get occasional casual and purely sexual relationships (no! not with prostitutes, but with real fwbs) - I care for my partners as friends, but there's no love feeling at all.
My sex life is way better than I was in my 20s (which was almost...non-existent) but I forgot this feeling of having a crush.

What's wrong with me? Anyone went into a such dramatic change in life outlook?

Nothing "wrong" with you. Perhaps you just got cynical about the idea of romance. Sex and love became practical to you.

I still get crushes (unfortunately, at times).

Kraftie, with all due respect, how comes this isn't something wrong? Normal people fall in love and get feelings.

Wait didn't you just get a girlfriend you said?

It doesn't matter if it is nothing big the mere fact it happens shows that you are climbing, now stop getting so cynical.

umm....sort of, it's a kind of uncommitted semi-LT temporary relationship.

It's a one-sided mad love relationship while I care for her dearly (but not as madly in love as her). She is fully aware of that.

I'm also perfectly able to get crushes, at least as much as when I was a teenager.

If you have friend-feelings for your lover, it's not the same thing as "not having feelings." You have love and respect for that person, but not in a narrowly romantic sense all the time. It's more complex than that.

I believe in, and have experienced "love": the obsession, the immersion in the other person, the butterflies in my stomach.

But most relationships are not of that nature--especially after a few months of constant romance. They become more "friendlike" with the added element of lust for each other.

There are moments within these relationships, though, whenlove-feelings re-emerge. Especially in times of doubt and need, and during physical intimacy and orgasm.

But these feelings often are not constant, especially amid "real life." There is always, in good relationships, an undercurrent of romance, though it might not be openly expressed.

Or maybe you just haven't found the "right" girl.

It's only pathological if you act hardened, and treat your lover like garbage because everything isn't "perfect."

That's the best relationship: a best-friendship with strong undercurrents of romance and lust. With room for adventure, yet the ability to see the reality of situations. And a respect for personal autonomy.

All this without obsession and possessiveness.

When, during demanding projects, you can gain solace through thoughts of your lover.