The girl I like just broke up with her boyfriend

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NeuroNurse
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

Joined: 23 Sep 2017
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 25

13 Feb 2018, 11:20 pm

And I don't know how to pursue anything with her. I like her very much and would love to go out with her, but I have never had a girlfriend and just don't know what to do. I see her everyday she is a classmate of mine. What should I do. She'll probably find a ne boyfriend and ill be out ofl uck.



honeymiel
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 3 Jan 2017
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 158

13 Feb 2018, 11:46 pm

Do you talk to her already or are you friends? If not, I would start by just building an acquaintance and casual friendship with her, slowly (think, chatting/messaging once or twice a week to start with).

You want to avoid giving her too much attention because that might make her uncomfortable: 1. Because she's probably very emotional after her break up, and 2. Because giving her too much attention and pursuing her too hard will make her feel like a piece of meat or an object that you're trying to attain as soon as she becomes available (and especially after her breakup when she feels vulnerable and may be an easier target)

Go slow - if she finds a new boyfriend while you're slowly trying to build a friendship/relationship with her, then she wasn't very interested anyway, so you're better off not having tried too hard. And trying too hard will probably scare her off anyway



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Feb 2018, 5:49 am

Ask her out for coffee.

Don’t do or say anything different than what youve been doing or saying previously.



AnonymousAnonymous
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 72,088
Location: Portland, Oregon

21 Feb 2018, 10:46 pm

Don't pursue a relationship too quickly because you may come off as someone who is desperate, which in turn may be a reason for her to avoid you.

Give her time to recover from the breakup.


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