The kind of women I am deemed compatible to be with

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My parents, grandmother, and some others have tried to set me up with potential girlfriends but they've never worked out.

My mother used to pressure me to date the only female member at the time in the support group I've been a part of for almost 12 years now. She was very religious (Bible Belt conditioning and most people in the support group have this as well which is why I don't go often anymore) and had overprotective parents who now don't allow her to not just date but not even have male friends. We did eat out a few times due to my mother pushing things but nothing more than casual conversation happened and even my mother realized it wasn't going to work out.

When that didn't work out, the next woman my mother tried to set me up with was again another religious woman who also had Fragile X Syndrome (I knew her brother who has the same affliction and my parents know their parents). I never actually met her since she only communicated by email and the day we were supposed to meet didn't work out because she said her car had a flat tire.

The third and last woman my mother attempted to set me up with was yet another religious woman who I had actually knew in grade school. She had an unhealthy attachment to her dog that growled and snapped at me. My older brother was also pressuring me to have sex with her because he claimed "The girls who want sex are the ones who aren't getting any!" and I got exasperated with his and other Bible Belt men's attitudes. I was also still suffering from having a bad summer that involved an unrequited love predicament (Someone who thought I wasn't dateable because I wasn't "Christian") and failed tenures at online dating.

My father tried to set me up with someone he knew through my aunt because she was friends with this girl's parents. She supposedly liked anime and was a classically trained musician but when I talked to her, she told me she had lost interest in the medium and our conversation didn't really go anywhere. She looked uninterested and I felt uncertain. This was back in 2013 and even then I was feeling hopeless about my romantic future.

My grandmother tried her hand at setting me up and so far it's been the final time anyone has tried at all for me. It was someone she knew at the gym she exercised at and would press the issue until I finally caved in. It was a dreadful experience because my mother drove me to meet her instead of letting me drive and dropped me off at a restaurant to meet this woman who also had her mother drop her off as well. She was older than me (31, I was 26 at the time) which isn't a bad thing in itself but I felt older mentally because she told me she only listened to Kelly Clarkson's music and she had the Bible Belt religious outlook on life. I also didn't find her physically attractive and we had no common interests. Because I didn't have my car, I had to wait until my mother came back to get me.

The message I get is that I am deemed only compatible with women men in the culture I live in usually don't want to date and I am not "good enough" for what society deems attractive so I have to lower my standards. The thing is that I am not wishing for a hot supermodel or cheerleader looking girl as a partner. I would be happy with someone who is simply attractive enough for me but I can't even get that.

Don’t let these people “deem” you.

“Deem” yourself. You know what you like, what you dig.

The Fragile X people you mentioned probably have a less severe form of it if they can drive.

The last guy my (previous) work colleagues thought I should give a go was 25 years older, married (not separated), not in good condition, I declined and was told I was too fussy. They changed their minds when I found him in my back garden (he'd followed me home) and had to get the police involved

I find there's a big difference between what people demand for themselves and what they think will do for other people.

Like you, I found that those whom others tried to pair me up with were people I had nothing in common with and nothing to talk about with.

I think they aren't selecting "duds". They are seeing a single person and saying, "yey a single person. Maybe my son will like them". Single is the thing they see and nothing else.

Don't take it personally. They just don't know many young single people to introduce you to and are just shoving anyone in your direction with no other thought than, "this woman is single."

At least you had family trying to set you up & you've given those women a chance. My family never even tried to set me up with anyone even after I asked em too because they probably didn't think I was compatible with anyone. My parents assumed I would stay single my whole life & probably thought I wasn't a good match for anyone. They even ask my current girlfriend How do you put up with this/that(insert various things about me)

They often seen the single status and “compatible” economic status as a common ground.

This is all in the past. Quit looking behind you.

If you continue to improve yourself and make yourself attractive to women, you can find yourself deemed to be compatible with any woman that you desire.