Any suggestions for how to get over someone?

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Is this hard for us aspies, doing this?

Only went out a couple times, after I had a long term crush on her. Didn't feel much of a connection at the time, but had second thoughts later while trying to be friends, got really weird about it. Now I'm mostly past it, but still a little obsessed. Part of its just that I'm embarrassed, and annoyed at myself for making it so bad.

I never fully got over both my exes & have been crushing on a celeb for like the last 8 years even thou I've been having a girlfriend for over 6 years. I have bad OCD so that may be some of it but it's being fairly well treated by a med now. They were all my special interest including my current girlfriend. It is very hard for us to change/loss our special interests sometimes.

For me I am over a woman once I realize they are worthless and have made no significant contributions to anything.

Consider what has this woman accomplished? For planet Earth, for her family, for humanity?

Would anyone remember anything of it 300 years from now?

You should be remorseful if it is a lot she has done otherwise not, and it is always otherwise.

Understand she's not special.

I find that spending a considerable amount of time, talking about it to someone and crying really helps, then acknowledging that it's over. Then keeping active and busy, tends to help stop with the procrastination and occupies the mind, more you're busy and distracting yourself, the less like you're going to be thinking of them.

Hope this helps.

I know I'm a little late, but figured I'd contribute what I have.

I went to a school dance with this girl I liked, and.. It didn't go past that. She knew I had liked her, but didn't want anything else and I just couldn't get over her. Just, how gorgeous she is, and kind she is. But, then I realized I'm wasting my time over something that's not going to happen. It's a big step to realize there is a problem, but an even bigger step when you take action to fight against that problem and find a solution for it.

When I thought about her I'd talk to my bestfriend, not about anything particular but just talked. We talked to clear my mind, if my bestfriend wasn't available I'd end up watching Netflix, playing on my phone, drawing, or something I enjoyed just to get her off my mind. It was no doubt extremely hard to overcome, but in the end it's way worth it. Not having that burden of her hovering over my head wherever I go, and pretty much taking over whatever I was doing.

Hope that helps in someway. Be sure to let us know how it goes and let us know what you did to solve it.

"Time heals all wounds." as the saying goes.

Perhaps, but the saying would be more truthful and accurate in my opinion if it went like this:

Time heals all wounds but some wounds leave a nasty scar.

Obviously we're all different and have relationships (or not) that vary in intensity and duration. Some of us never fully "get over" a relationship or get over the pain of how a particular relationship may have ended. The pain subsides over time, but may never fully go away. I think that's OK. It's part of life. Life is everything including pleasure/pain, happiness/sadness, triumph/tragedy, gain/loss, elation/suffering, bliss/despair, etc. and everything in between.

Give yourself time and be mindful of recognizing obsessiveness with this issue. Grieving over a relationship loss is healthy. Perpetual obsession over a relationship loss is a bad thing and should be dealt with by recognizing and overcoming it yourself or seeking help from someone else.

All my life i've had it incredibly difficult getting over someone I loved, friend or boyfriend or even just a crush i've never spoken to!

My first love was a toxic narcissist yet it's taken my until this year (4 years after having met him for the first time) to finally START getting over him for real. I mostly cringe when thinking about him now and last time I saw him (2 months ago) it didn't hurt as much as I thought it would, I no longer felt faint just seeing him. Most other people in my life thinks it's a little pathetic because he wasn't a good person most of the time but I can't help it.

I get stuck on people very easily basically. I've always blamed my aspergers for this because i've read in several places that this is a common problem for aspies - difficulty moving on. Could be because of our tendency to dislike changes of any kind as well as how many of us find it hard to meet new people. I lost a what I consider close friend this year and my only friend who lives nearby enough so we could hang out several days a week. Our friendship hadn't been very good the last couple months with lots of arguments and me getting hurt a lot. Eventually my friend called the quits on our friendship due to our differences and i'm still sad over it. I've talked it out with my other friends and they mostly seem to consider it a good riddance but I still tear up sometimes at good memories of ours.

My best advice really though is to let time pass and to talk to someone about your feelings. Remind yourself things don't work out for a reason and the people who are meant to be in your life will be there and they will wanna stay. There's no good really in holding on to someone who doesn't want us around especially when there's always gonna be someone who'll accept us for who we are.

@Superaliengirl

"I get stuck on people very easily basically. I've always blamed my aspergers for this because i've read in several places that this is a common problem for aspies - difficulty moving on"

I've found that too. Totally relate.